Chapter 67: WHITE BONE INHERITANCE (SIGMA LOOT ARC)
THE MILK VAT TREASURE TROVE
The bone hall stretched before them, its walls and floor crafted entirely from interlocked skeletal remains. At its center stood a massive vat filled with milky-white liquid that emitted a sweet, nourishing aroma—the legendary Milk Spring, Bai Gu Mountain's most prized resource.
Fang Yuan's eyes gleamed with recognition. "According to Bai Hua's memories, this vat connects to a natural milk spring beneath. In my past life, the Bai Clan commercialized this stuff—sold it like premium almond milk."
He motioned to Bai Ning Bing. "There are Gu inside. Check it."
Bai Ning Bing scoffed but complied, plunging her hand into the vat. When she withdrew it, her fingers clutched dozens of Bone Spear Gu—rank one Gu shaped like miniature white spears.
"There must be hundreds in here!" she muttered, surprised despite herself.
Fang Yuan nodded. "Keep looking. There should be rank two variants."
After several more dips, she retrieved a handful of Spiral Bone Spear Gu, their surfaces etched with helical grooves for increased penetration power.
"Finally, a reliable attack method," Fang Yuan mused, recalling the limitations of his Charred Thunder Potato Gu. "No more gambling on enemies stepping in the right spot."
Bai Ning Bing pocketed one Spiral Bone Spear Gu but sighed. "Pity there's no rank three Gu here."
SPRING AUTUMN RIZZ'S BROKEN REFINEMENT SPREE
With the coast clear, Fang Yuan began his true harvest.
His hands moved like a conveyor belt—hauling Gu from the vat, channeling the Spring Autumn Rizz's aura, and refining them instantly.
Bai Ning Bing's Reaction:
😶 "..." (Watches him refine 50 Gu in a minute)
😳 "You... what the hell?" (Sees him hit 100)
😐 "This is unnatural." (200 Bone Spear Gu and 20 Spiral Bone Spear Gu later)
Fang Yuan smirked. "Efficiency."
The Problem:
These Gu required milk to sustain—something Fang Yuan lacked.
Solution? "If I can't feed them, neither can the Bai Clan."
Bai Ning Bing's chainsaw centipede whirred to life, reducing the remaining Gu to worthless fragments. The sound of dying Gu worms was like the crunch of a thousand primeval stones being vaporized.
"Wasteful," she muttered, though her eye twitch betrayed her pain.
THE THREE PILLAR DILEMMA
The next hall housed three bone pillars, each topped with a skeletal hand cradling a Gu:
Ribcage Shield Gu (Grows extra ribs for permanent armor)
Flying Bone Shield Gu (Three auto-orbiting bone frisbees)
Arm Bone Wings Gu (Forearm wings for +10% attack speed)
The inscription warned: "Three, choose one. Leave the rest for future inheritors."
Fang Yuan's Analysis:
Ribcage Shield was redundant with his carapace Gu.
Arm Bone Wings didn't suit his ranged combat style.
Flying Bone Shields offered versatile defense.
Decision: He shattered the middle pillar, claiming the Flying Bone Shield Gu.
Bai Ning Bing eyed the remaining two greedily but hesitated. "A test of restraint?"
Fang Yuan nodded. "Righteous inheritances reward patience. Greed triggers lesser rewards."
THE GREY BONE SCHOLAR'S FINAL TEST
The third hall housed the skeletal remains of the Grey Bone Scholar, seated cross-legged before a massive bone tome.
The Grey Bone Huge Book contained:
Refinement recipes
The scholar's memoirs
A final request: "Kowtow three times, then retrieve my lifebound Gu from my skull."
Fang Yuan's Performance:
Drops to his knees with dramatic flair.
Slams forehead into the ground—THUD. THUD. THUD.—each impact echoing like a gong.
Stands, dusts off his pants, and waits.
Bai Ning Bing's Reaction: "You... actually respect the dead?"
Fang Yuan smirked. "I respect well-designed mechanisms."
A hidden door groaned open.
Second Layer: Leave the corpse untouched for a better reward.
Fang Yuan kicked the skeleton apart, retrieving the Bone Spike Gu (rank 3, damages user first).
Third Door: Creaks open.
Bai Ning Bing blinked. "You triggered both paths?!"
Fang Yuan shrugged. "Why choose when you can cheat?"
Twitch Chat Reacts:
🐄 "MILK SPRING = OVERPOWERED HEALTH POTION"
💀 "BRO REFINED GU LIKE HE WAS SCROLLING TIKTOK"
🛡️ "FLYING BONE SHIELDS = AUTOMATED BODYGUARDS"
BAI CLAN'S MALDING ARC (AS ALWAYS LOL)
BOOOOM!
The wall exploded like a TikTokker's career after controversy, revealing a hidden cave. Dust cleared, and Bai Clan NPCs stood there looking dumber than a Fortnite default skin.
Bai Clan Random #1: "GYATT DAMN! They really no-clipped into a secret tunnel?!"
Bai Clan Leader (face redder than a Rank 5 Gu's aura): "I CAN'T BELIEVE I GOT RIZZED BY TWO TEENAGE GREMLINS! MY LOW TAPER FADE IS FUMING RN!"
Tie Dao Ku (NPC Sherlock mode): "This is clearly an inheritance ground. Those two Ohio skibidi villains played y'all like a free trial MMO."
Bai Lian (realizing she got reverse-psychology'd): "No cap… they were NPC-ing US this whole time?! I thought I was the manipulator!"
Bai Clan Leader (malding so hard her Gu worms shivered): "I SWEAR ON MY ANCESTOR'S GRAVE, I'M GONNA EDGE THOSE TWO TILL THEY BEG FOR A BAN!"
Bai Clan NPCs (coping harder than Twitch chat after a streamer's L):
"Bro left NO GU WORMS? NOT EVEN A COMMON?! That's some sigma grindset."
"They massacred the Gu worms like it was a MW2 lobby… zero respect."
"Clan leader, LET US COOK THEM! We got the primeval stones for it!"
Tie Dao Ku (still NPC-ing): "Y'all really brute-forcing the bone spikes? That's some NPC behavior. There's literally a mechanism—"
Bai Clan Elder (triggered): "SHUT YO SKIBIDI-TOILET-LOOKIN' MOUTH! MY YOUNG MASTERS MIGHT BE TURNED INTO FROZEN PIZZA ROLLS BY NOW!"
FANG YUAN & BAI NING BING SIGMA GRINDSET (LOOTING SPEEDRUN ANY%)
Fang Yuan (holding Bone Spike Gu like it's a mid-tier loot drop): "This Gu's like a cactus with trust issues… stabs you AND itself. Mid."
Bai Ning Bing (side-eyeing): "If I use this, my ice muscles gonna turn into Ohio slushie. Hard pass."
Fang Yuan (shrugging): "Skill issue." (Refines it anyway because loot is loot, even if it's trash.)
They enter the "Flesh Sac Secret Chamber" (which sounds like a Discord mod's basement after a ban wave).
Bai Ning Bing (pushing the door): "Why's it warm… OH HELL NAH—"
The walls: "Heeheehee… HAHAHA…" (Imagine a chorus of Discord mod laughs.)
Fang Yuan (unfazed): "Bro, we just walked into a meme page. These walls got more rizz than Bai Clan's entire bloodline."
Bai Ning Bing (glancing at teeth-lined walls): "Nah, this is 'me when the pizza rolls are done' type energy."
BAI CLAN'S COPING HARDER THAN TWITCH CHAT IN A DRAMA STREAM
Bai Clan NPCs (entering first hall, seeing massacred Gu worms):
"DAMN, THEY WENT JOHN WICK ON THESE GU WORMS!"
"Not even a Primogem left… bro hates free pulls."
Second Hall (Three Pillars Arc):
"Wait… they LEFT two Gu worms? That's SUS."
"'Three, choose one'? Bro think they're Yoda giving life advice?"
Bai Clan Leader (still malding): "I DON'T CARE IF IT'S A 'RIGHTEOUS PATH' INHERITANCE! MY KIDS BETTER NOT BE TURNED INTO FROZEN BANANA SPLITS!"
Tie Dao Ku (NPC intuition tingling): "Something's off… like a Fortnite update that accidentally deletes your skins."
Third Hall (Gray Bone Scholar's Skeleton):
"Oh hell nah, bro left a Yelp review: 'Satisfied at heart'."
"Clan leader, we found a Bone Spike Gu in his skull! Free loot!"
Bai Clan Leader (finally smiling): "Good. Now let's catch those two before they speedrun this whole dungeon like it's a Roblox obby."
Twitch Chat Reacts:
💀 "Fang Yuan out here looting like a Walmart employee on Black Friday."
🍿 "Bai Clan NPCs realizing they've been NPC'd is peak comedy."
🐍 "Sigma rule #283: Always leave one Gu worm to traumatize the enemy."
FLESH SAC SECRET CHAMBER (AKA DISCORD MOD'S NIGHTMARE)
The Flesh Sac Secret Chamber was wildin'—walls lined with Grinch-smile mouths, teeth clenched like a Karen at a Black Friday sale.
Bai Ning Bing (side-eyeing the walls): "Bro, why these walls laughing at us like we just failed a math test?"
Fang Yuan (unbothered): "Relax, it's just Flesh Laughter Gu—like Earth Treasury Flower but with more rizz."
Suddenly:
Teeth YEET off a mouth.
A SCARLET TONGUE slithers out like a Walmart receipt.
A POCKET-SIZED BONE BOOK sits on the tongue like a cursed Happy Meal toy.
Fang Yuan (reading): "Congrats, 'pure-hearted' successor! You've unlocked the TRUE inheritance. Knock teeth for Gu worms—RNG lootbox style!"
Bai Ning Bing (immediately taps a tooth like it's a gacha pull):
DING! A Flesh-Bone Gu (rank 3 healing Gu) pops out—pearly white dentures with "raise the dead" rizz.
Fang Yuan (eyes glowing): "GYATT DAMN! That's the GOATed healing Gu—pair it with Rising Dead Gu, and you're basically unkillable!"
Bai Ning Bing (evil smirk): "Want it? Trade me the Yang Gu."
Fang Yuan (deadpan): "Nah, I'd win."
Bai Ning Bing (malding): "Fang Yuan, I'm NOT afraid of death. At worst, we BOTH TAKE THE L."
Fang Yuan (sigma grin): "Cool story. But without me, you're stuck here like a noob in a tutorial level. Bai Clan's already malding outside—try me."
(Bai Ning Bing hesitates—Fang Yuan's 500 IQ psychological warfare works again.)
BAI CLAN'S MALDING SPEEDRUN (TWICE IN A SINGLE CHAPTER)
Meanwhile, outside:
Bai Clan NPCs burst out of the tunnel, realizing they took the wrong path like noobs in a maze.
Tie Dao Ku (NPC Sherlock): "This inheritance's got branching paths—we took the L route while Fang Yuan took the W route."
Bai Clan Leader (seething): "TURN BACK! WE'RE GETTING COOKED BY TWO TEENS!"
Random Elder (coping): "Maybe they died in there?"
Bai Clan Leader (eyes glowing red): "I'LL BELIEVE IT WHEN I SEE THEIR SKIBIDI-TOILET LOOKIN' CORPSES."
FANG YUAN'S ULTIMATE GAMBLE
Back in the chamber:
Fang Yuan (panicking internally): "We're on a timer—Bai Clan's gonna edge us soon."
Bai Ning Bing (still side-eyeing him): "You're acting sus… you DO have a plan, right?"
Fang Yuan (improvisation 100): "Of course. Wake up the twins—they're the real MCs of this arc."
Bai Hua & Bai Sheng (waking up confused): "Where… are we? Why do I hear Ohio battle music?"
Fang Yuan (smirking): "Kids, wanna play Gu roulette? Knock teeth for loot."
(The twins, being plot-armored protagonists, immediately pull a Legendary Gu on their first try.)
Bai Ning Bing (realizing): "…Fang Yuan, you USED THEM like a free trial!"
Fang Yuan (shrugs): "Sigma rule #69: If NPCs have luck stats, exploit them."
TWITCH CHAT REACTIONS:
💀 "Fang Yuan out here playing 4D chess while Bai Clan's playing checkers."
🍿 "Bai Ning Bing malding harder than a League player in promos."
🐍 "Flesh-Bone Gu? More like 'me when the dentist says no cavities'."
🔥 "Bai Clan Leader's rage meter is at 1000%—girl needs a Snickers."
FINAL SIGMA MOMENT: