Fuhrer Wakes
Oh my gosh… I really thought an earthquake hit my house. For a second, I even started doubting the engineer and the contractor who swore it was earthquake-proof. Useless promises. But wait—it's just a dream. Must've been the turbulence. That shaky feeling probably slipped into my sleep and turned into a nightmare. Dreams do that, right? They copy whatever's happening outside the body.
Yeah… it's the turbulence. The ship's been shaking, and that turned into a fake quake in my head.
Where's Diazo?
"Oh, this AI crap again. Always flying over me like I'm some lab rat."
(He snapped his fingers toward the nearest voice-assist panel.)
"Call Diazo. Now. Ask that man what kind of shitty craft this is. Shakes like some goddamn second-hand German sedan."
Diazo (through intercom):"My Fuhrer, I thought you were asleep. The turbulence—yes, apologies for the inconvenience. Minor propulsion glitch. Already being resolved. I'll be in your chamber shortly, Fuhrer."
"Where the hell is my bathrobe? I'm not standing here naked in front of him. One look at my size, and he'll form opinions. I won't allow that. No man rules a galaxy with a questionable impression."
As if hearing him, the AI drone projected a soft beam and floated toward a compartment. A robe unfolded neatly and dropped into the Fuhrer's hands.
"Well… at least it's good for something."
A soft chime — the door slid open.
Diazo entered, crisp and alert.
Diazo:"Mrrr… Fuhrer, how was your first night aboard the spacecraft? I truly didn't expect the turbulence to reach the 80th floor. Sincere apologies."
Fuhrer :
"You know… back when I'd just become president, I made a pact with myself to keep certain things hidden.Small ones. Things that didn't matter in the bigger picture. But now that we're up here, floating through the stars, who cares?
There was this one night… I was on my private jet, flying from Las Vegas to my island in the Pacific. The plane was full of girls — European, loud, flashy. We were mid-air, I was holding a glass of whiskey, trying to look presidential, even charming. Then, just as I lifted the glass—bam—turbulence. The whiskey spilled all over my chest."
"They laughed. The girls. Laughed at me. My shirt soaked, the whiskey dripping like I was some fool. I was humiliated.
"Guess what happened when we landed diazo ?"
Diazo (half-grinning):"Hmm… the pilot lost his job? The escorts didn't get paid?" No u slapped the escorts ..
Fuhrer :
No, Diazo. Neither the pilot nor the girls or the jet ever flew again..
"The New York Times — fake paper, failing paper — they put out this headline: 'Private Jet Burns Mid-Air. Fuhrer Miraculously Survives.' Big letters. Very dramatic."
"They said it was engine failure. Total nonsense. The engine was perfect. Beautiful. The real problem? That pilot — shaky hands — very nervous. Couldn't handle pressure. And the girls? Laughing like hyenas. No respect. Just laughing, laughing…"
"And that laugh? That's what did it. That's what brought the whole damn thing down."
Diazo (lowering his voice):"I'm deeply sorry, Fuhrer. I assure you — the propulsion issue has been fixed. We'll arrive at the new planet soon. People up to the 80th floor of this ship are already worshipping you like a god. They believe you saved them… gave them a future. To them, you are wisdom. You are their god."
Fuhrer :
Can I speak to them? I want to address them — let them see me. There's no night or day in space, right? Just this... eternal floating."
Diazo:"Of course, Fuhrer. The AI device will handle the broadcast. Just give it a second…"
Fuhrer (broadcasting):"Hello, my people… I'm glad to speak to you during this journey.
Remember this: you were chosen. Handpicked. A thousand among billions. That makes you the luckiest people in human history..Nobody's ever been luckier. Nobody.
You're here because you're better than the scum we wiped off. Because you're purebred, not mixed trash.
We're heading to something amazing — something beautiful. A whole new world. Heaven, if you want to call it that. We're gonna live the way no human beings have ever lived. Not even close.
No more mess. No more problems. No black poops, no colored smells, no poverty — just clean, perfect living. Top-level people only. The highest of the highest. It's gonna be so good you won't believe it.
And history? Who cares! No one's left to read it. We don't need history. We're building something brand new. Something pure.
Even kings and queens — the so-called royalty — they never had it this good. Not even a little.
So sit tight. The ride's almost over. We'll be landing soon, thanks to our very smart and very capable Diazo. Tremendous guy.
Alright. That's it for now. You've got the best future ahead — believe me. Goodbye for now, and enjoy the ride."