Now listen. I'm a lot of things — loud, brave, devastatingly handsome — but most of all, I'm a guy who holds a grudge. So as we were leaving that bizarre tavern filled with unpaid bills and shattered egos, I gave good ol' Eymen one last look.
And I bowed.
Real slow, real solemn — just like the monks do.
Then I raised my middle finger straight up like a tribute to the Archons. Greg even tilted his head reverently, as if to say, "Amen, brother."
Eymen looked insulted. Perfect.
My job here was done.
"Let's go," I said, turning dramatically. "We have a Greek statue of a man to chase."
Paimon floated closer to my shoulder, arms crossed. "You think he moisturizes or does his skin just naturally glow from constant judgment?"
"That's not a glow," I replied. "That's the passive effect of being allergic to fun."
We tracked Alhaitham for a few minutes, dodging through alleyways and backstreets. Which was a problem, because I was still recovering from the whiplash of being dragged by Lumine earlier. My neck was now 30% longer than before. Pretty sure I could cosplay a giraffe now. Or worse, a Sumeru scarecrow.
"You okay there?" Lumine asked, glancing back.
"I've seen less violence in weekly training drills," I croaked. "Pretty sure I can hear colors now. Also, I think my spine filed a restraining order."
Paimon huffed, catching her breath. "Does this guy always walk like he's got somewhere more important to be than anywhere else on the continent?"
"I'm convinced he just floats on smugness," I muttered.
"Try to keep your voice down," Lumine said, adjusting her hood. "He might hear us."
"I want him to hear me. He needs to know I'm onto his anime protagonist act."
"Please don't pick a fight with the walking encyclopedia," Lumine added.
Then finally, we saw him.
Paimon zoomed ahead, flailing. "Wait up! …It's Alhaitham, right?"
He barely glanced back. "What do you want?"
Lumine stepped forward. "Thank you for your help back there."
"No need for thanks," he replied with all the warmth of a library fine notice. "My goal was to get to them, and you two gave me just the opportunity I needed. We're even."
Even?! Bro we almost got scammed out of half a million Mora and I punched a guy for Dendro Mommy justice! This man was ice-cold.
He added, "I advise you to keep your distance from them. Since they didn't make off with your Mora, they might try again."
"Wait, that's it?" I said, stepping in. "You just drop truth bombs and leave like you're some wandering knowledge vigilante?"
"I prefer the term 'efficient negotiator,'" Alhaitham said, deadpan.
Then he turned and started walking off.
"Hold your scholarly horses!" Paimon hovered in front of him. "We still have something to ask you!"
Alhaitham sighed like we were the worst footnote in his thesis.
"Look, I know we're annoying," I said, "but think of us as your emotional support chaos team."
He gave me a blank stare. Honestly, I think that hurt more than a punch.
Paimon pressed on. "Since you tore through their scam so easily, you must know what's really going on, right?"
Alhaitham narrowed his eyes. "Who exactly are you, and why are you inquiring?"
"We're students from the Akademiya," Lumine said, which was technically true, even if I felt like the class clown who accidentally enrolled in AP Quantum Philosophy.
He looked me up and down. "A student? Even that weird one with the lizard crown?"
"Hey!" I pointed at Greg. "He's our team's emotional support lizard-slash-wardrobe upgrade!"
Greg flicked his tail in approval.
"Also, I do all the reading!" I added proudly.
"You read cereal boxes," Paimon deadpanned.
"They're informative!"
Lumine stepped in. "Perhaps we can talk terms? I know a thing or two about swordplay."
"More than a thing or two," I added, "She made a Ruin Guard cry once."
"She did," Paimon said helpfully. "It was oddly emotional."
"Yeah, tears of hydraulic fluid everywhere," I said, nodding solemnly.
Paimon nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah! She's really strong! Weren't you saying something about a 'physical exchange'? We can help with that!"
Alhaitham raised a brow. "She doesn't have a Vision. And neither does the idiot one."
"Excuse me—"
"Forget it," he added before I could monologue about being Visionless but fabulous.
Paimon persisted. "Maybe not, but they can still use elemental energy! And those thugs are definitely bringing backup. Even if you don't go alone, you won't regret having us with you!"
Lumine muttered, "He doesn't need a Vision. He's powered by caffeine, sarcasm, and poor decisions."
"Thank you, I take that as a compliment," I said proudly.
Alhaitham studied us, then gave a slow nod. "Alright. Got a pen and paper?"
I offered him a crumpled napkin. Close enough.
"If you're searching for someone who sells that kind of merchandise, I'll give you one of their addresses. Try your luck."
Paimon looked hopeful. "So, does that mean you can tell us what it is we're after?"
Alhaitham scoffed. "You were willing to hand over 500,000 Mora for something, and you didn't even know what it was?"
Okay, fair.
Then he reached into his pocket and pulled something out: a glowing green capsule.
"A Knowledge Capsule," he said.
My eyes lit up. "Oh! I know that one!"
Lumine stared. "You do?"
"Yeah! It's like a USB stick that drank ten espressos, hit the gym, and then decided to major in illegal knowledge transfers. You plug it into your brain and bam — instant download. It's like pirating an entire semester's worth of lectures into your frontal lobe without the suffering part. It's basically cheating, but with extra steps and glowing green accessories."
Alhaitham blinked. "You're an idiot. But for an idiot, you're surprisingly accurate."
I beamed. "See? Validation!"
Lumine facepalmed. "He's like that all the time. We've stopped questioning it. We don't want to get influenced any further."
"Too late," Paimon muttered.
Greg gave me another tail flick, possibly proud, possibly judgmental. Honestly, I don't even know anymore.
Alhaitham continued, "Anyone who links this to their Akasha Terminal instantly gains its contents."
"Anyone?" Lumine asked.
"Correct. Unlike the Akasha, which restricts access, these Capsules have no safeguards."
Paimon hovered closer. "That's amazing…"
"Convenient and harmless in theory," Alhaitham said. "But it's illegal. Created to transfer knowledge from Irminsul into the Akasha. They're meant to be destroyed after use."
"Of course it's illegal," I muttered. "Everything fun is."
He went on, sounding like a lecture wrapped in mystery. Something about scholars, black markets, and fate-defying rebels. I tried to keep up, but I got distracted by how his biceps twitched whenever he emphasized a point.
"And now they're worth a fortune," he concluded.
Lumine nodded. "I heard the Akademiya lost something recently. Seems like it's a Capsule?"
Alhaitham paused. "Ah… so that's your true objective."
"We want to learn more," she added.
"With our current arrangement," he said, "I don't believe I can offer an answer."
"What do we have to do?" Lumine asked. "Perhaps we can negotiate further."
Alhaitham sighed. "You're still resolved… Fine. Let's talk somewhere with fewer people."
And with that, we moved to someplace quieter. You know, fewer people.
Fewer witnesses.
Less damage control when I inevitably open my mouth.
Pray for Alhaitham.
***
We walked deeper into the market, away from the main street buzz and the random guy yelling "Two apples for one!" in the distance like that was some kind of revolutionary deal. Eventually, we found ourselves in a quieter area — fewer people, fewer eyes, fewer chances of collateral damage.
I gave a solid nod. "Yup yup. Less people, less casualty."
Lumine threw me a look. "You sound like you're planning to destroy something again."
I just grinned, that dangerous little smirk I save for when I'm about to do something that gets us into legal gray areas. "When was the last time we discussed something shady without chaos following?"
She paused. "...Point taken."
Greg gave me a tail flick. I think he was judging me. Again.
Alhaitham stopped, folded his arms, and leaned against a column like he was about to drop a philosophical bomb.
"Let's continue our conversation here," he said. "If you wish to learn more about the Knowledge Capsule the Akademiya lost, you must help me with something."
Lumine nodded, cool and collected. "What is it?"
"I need you to find someone named Dori, a traveling merchant."
I blinked. "Oh. The gremlin?"
Alhaitham raised an eyebrow. "You know her?"
"I've heard stories. Mostly from... forums. Let's just say she's the type who'd sell you bottled air and convince you it's enchanted. Honestly? I respect the hustle. Great for hot days, and even better for scams"
"Sounds about right," Lumine muttered.
Alhaitham ignored me, professional to the end. "Unlike the peddlers who hawk inferior Knowledge Capsules, she has quality stock. Some say there's nothing she won't sell for the right price."
"She's the physical manifestation of 'Mora first, questions never,'" I added.
"She's... resourceful," Alhaitham corrected. "And wary of Akademiya people. She likely blacklisted me. Her informant wouldn't let me near her."
Paimon hovered, already on edge. "So... what, you want us to be your shady middlemen?"
"Become one of her customers and earn her trust. That's the condition for further collaboration."
"Why us?" Paimon asked, crossing her arms.
"Until you complete this task, you don't have question privileges."
"That's... rude," I muttered.
"I'm efficient."
"Yeah, and I'm majestic," I scoffed.
Paimon deflated. "Fine. So how do we do this?"
"You three are outlanders, so she might view you as safe. I'll give you the informant's address and the contact password."
"Do we have to knock three times and say something ominous like 'the squirrel dances at midnight'?" I asked.
"That would be needlessly complicated," Alhaitham replied, completely serious.
"Right," I nodded. "So it's probably that."
"Beyond the password, I can't predict what other measures she'll take. You'll have to improvise."
"Oh, perfect," Paimon sighed. "This is nerve-racking..."
"It gets better," Alhaitham said. "The true challenge is after you meet her. She has a keen eye and only respects those with good taste."
"I've got great taste," I said, striking a pose. "I once bought five silk scarves just because a lizard sneezed on them."
Lumine looked at me like I had two heads. "Exactly why we need to be extra careful."
"High fashion is a misunderstood art," I mumbled.
Alhaitham continued unfazed. "I'll prepare funds. Buy her best wares and earn her approval."
Paimon looked worried. "But we don't even know how to tell good Capsules from bad! Isn't that, like, important?"
"No need to worry!" I puffed my chest. "I know a lot about them."
"Which is exactly why we need to be careful," Lumine deadpanned.
Greg nodded solemnly. Even he agreed.
Alhaitham nodded. "That's true. Have you two heard of Elemental Sight?"
"I can use it," Lumine said.
"Oh?" Alhaitham actually looked mildly impressed. "I'll have to hold you in higher regard. That ability should resolve your issue."
"Me too, me too!" I chimed in. "I once saw Elemental Sight and tried to activate it by squinting really hard."
"...Right," he said slowly, pulling out two Capsules. "Try this. Can you see the difference?"
"They look the same to Paimon."
"Use Elemental Sight."
Lumine focused, eyes glowing faintly.
"How'd it go?" Paimon asked.
"The one on the left shines brighter."
Alhaitham nodded. "Higher quality Capsules usually shine brighter in Elemental Sight. They're richer in Dendro energy, since knowledge originates from Irminsul."
I raised a hand. "Does that mean I can finally download the knowledge of making perfect tea without accidentally inventing poison?"
"No," Alhaitham said flatly.
"Worth a shot."
"Anyway," he continued, "some Capsules glow bright but are outdated and useless in modern times. So brightness isn't everything."
"Like Shigeru's sense of humor," Lumine added.
"Rude!" I gasped. "I am consistently hilarious."
Greg squeaked. Possibly sarcastically.
"Using Elemental Sight is just a stop-gap," Alhaitham finished. "But it should be enough to gain Dori's trust."
Paimon sighed. "That still sounds super complicated..."
"Here's the informant's location and password," he handed us a paper. "And here's the Mora."
My eyes sparkled. "Is it bad I feel like we just got sponsored by a walking textbook?"
"Don't be cheap," Alhaitham warned. "Spend well. And if any Mora is left over, you can keep it."
"Aw yeah, snacks are on me tonight!" I grinned.
"Oh, and exercise caution. The matra are present in Port Ormos lately. If they catch you, everything falls apart."
"Matra?" Paimon echoed.
"They're the Akademiya's regulatory enforcers. They handle cases like illegal Knowledge Capsule trade. If they get involved, you're done."
"I feel like they'd love me," I said. "I radiate innocence."
"You radiate something, alright," Lumine said.
Greg sneezed.
Alhaitham gave us a final once-over. "You can back out now if it's too risky."
Lumine stood firm. "We're willing to take that risk. We'll find Dori."
"Alright. If you succeed, find me at the Wikala Funduq."
With that, he turned and walked off.
I turned to the group. "Alright, gang! Time to find that little gremlin. We'll probably get scammed, swindled, and emotionally manipulated… but it's all part of the thrill!"
Greg squeaked dramatically.
"Exactly, Greg! Adventure is always one scam away from greatness!"
Paimon sighed. "Paimon hope this gremlin doesn't try to sell us air in a bottle."
"She probably will," Lumine muttered.
"Let's just hope it's premium air," I said.
We set off into the sun-drenched alleys once more.
Dori, here we come.
…And my Mora pouch is already trembling in fear.
________________________
End of Chapter 91
Quests Completed:
*Learned about the true purpose of Knowledge Capsules and how to use Elemental Sight to judge their quality.
*Failed to resist making stupid jokes during a serious academic explanation (as expected).
*Accepted Alhaitham's deal to find Dori and infiltrate the black market of Knowledge Capsules.
*Successfully use Elemental Sight to judge Knowledge Capsules.
*Resist the urge to pretend you're in a Dendro-themed spy movie.
Rewards:
*Mora ×500,000 (Temporarily borrowed... please don't die with it)
*2x Knowledge Capsules (High Quality, Irminsul-flavored)
*New Keyword Learned: "Matra" – AKA The Fun Police
*Dori's Informant Password (It's definitely not "sussy mushroom," right?)
*Greg's Disapproval Level: +1
*Shigeru's Scam Radar Unlocked (Passive skill – only works after being scammed)
*Lumine's Passive: "Exasperated Sighs" –(Automatically triggers when I speak for longer than 10 seconds)
*Paimon's Backup Plan: Emergency "Nope out of the scam" teleport (cooldown: 48 hours)
Achievement:
"Academiya Ain't Got Nothin' On Me"
-Successfully debated with Alhaitham without being labeled clinically insane... Okay, maybe just "mildly unstable."