Chapter 84: The Girl I Met Online Is an Angel
Saturday.
On the weekend before the Golden Week holiday, Sakurai Saki just wanted to lazily stay at home.
But life never goes the way we want. Have you ever heard of Murphy's Law? If something has a chance of going wrong, no matter how small, it will definitely go wrong.
Here's a simple example: in a certain gacha game that starts with the letter 'G' and has a pity threshold of 90 rolls, around the final 15 rolls, there's always someone who thinks—no matter how unlucky they are, there's no way the item drops on the final pull, right?
And yet—it happens.
Humans can choose not to believe in anything, but they absolutely must believe in their own bad luck.
All of the above comes from Sakurai Saki's gacha experience.
It's currently 9:30 AM, and Sakurai Saki is getting ready to head to Gabriel's place.
Just now, Gabriel had sent out a distress signal—[Aki, if you don't come I'm gonna die!]
Gabriel: .·°՞(¯□¯)՞°·.
Even though he knew she was probably exaggerating, Sakurai Saki couldn't completely rule out the possibility that it was true.
Gabriel's apartment is in Nakano, Tokyo. The area has convenient transportation, cheap housing, so the population density is fairly high.
Gabriel is a useless angel, living off subsidies from Heaven, and even has to work part-time to survive because she spends too much money on gacha. For her, living in this area is all about saving on expenses… and spending more on microtransactions.
Speaking of money, there's something worth mentioning.
A few months ago, Gabriel once suggested that Sakurai Saki become her sugar daddy and sponsor her. Just 300,000 yen a month, she said, and she'd always listen to him no matter what. She even threw in exorcism services.
[Having an angel as a lover sounds amazing, right?]
( ๑‾̀◡‾́)✨
—that's what she said.
After that, Sakurai Saki glanced around the trash-filled room and the pitch-black halo hovering above her head, and promptly refused.
If he really had to sponsor an sugar angel, he'd want someone way better—someone who could offer more than just a pretty face and an addiction to gaming and microtransactions.
...
Leaving Higashi-Nakano Station, he passed through a bustling shopping district.
By a little past 10 AM, Sakurai Saki was standing in front of a slightly run-down apartment complex.
Two floors, stairway on the side, no front gate.
Scary as hell!
Only someone like Gabriel would dare to live in a place like this. If a criminal or a pervert came here, forget taking her money—he'd be lucky to escape without having to pay her instead.
But Gabriel wouldn't care about how those criminals felt. All she thought about was making money. Heaven had a quota system for angels on Earth—the more good deeds they did, the higher their monthly subsidy. For demons, it was the opposite: the more bad deeds, the more money.
Under those conditions, Gabriel would do anything for money.
As for those unlucky criminals who got beaten up by a petite girl and possibly left with PTSD—Sakurai Saki had no idea.
Climbing the stairs, ignoring the creaking sounds from the rusty iron steps beneath him, Sakurai Saki reached the second floor.
Standing in front of room F206, Sakurai Saki pulled the key from his pocket.
He slid it into the lock, fiddled with it for a bit, and finally got it to turn. The door creaked open.
This apartment felt like it was just a few years away from collapsing. The sense of danger was palpable—only Gabriel would dare live here.
Sakurai Saki wasn't exaggerating. Gabriel was the only one living in this apartment right now.
Even though the rent was dirt cheap, the low safety and looming risk of collapse made it uninhabitable for most sane people.
"Hum hum hum~" — A cheerful tune rang out from inside the room.
The moment Sakurai Saki pushed open the door, he was hit with a powerful psychic attack right to the face.
This... this is what she calls "about to die"?
Saki felt... his fists starting to clench!
"Dadadadada~ dame tenshi~?"
Gabriel hummed along to the melody.
"Dadadadada~ dame desuka??"
Gabriel: ꒰ঌ(˶ˆᗜˆ˵)໒꒱
Sakurai Saki: ∘ ∘ ∘ (·•᷄v•᷅ )???
What the hell kind of song is that?
Is she... insulting herself?
He had heard that song before — DADADADA Tenshi, a track about a useless angel. But hearing it come out of Gabriel's mouth... just felt wrong somehow.
After changing his shoes at the entrance and stepping through the living room, Sakurai Saki took one glance at the mountain of trash scattered across the floor and instantly his face was covered in dark lines.
One year ago, when he first met Gabriel, she was still a model angel — gentle, kind, polite. But now... how did she end up like this in just one short year?
The drug known as Video Games sure does ruin people!
Too bad angels are immune to electric shock therapy, or Sakurai Saki would've already dragged her off for a forced internet detox.
Ignoring the trash in the living room, Sakurai Saki pushed open the bedroom door.
Inside, a long-haired girl with messy hair, wearing only underwear and a large, baggy long-sleeve shirt, was sprawled out on the floor. On her left was a half-finished can of soda, and on her right was a torn bag of potato chips.
"♪ The angel's halo flickers like it's about to go out ♪"
She happened to sing that line just then.
At the same time, Sakurai Saki caught sight of the halo above her head — pitch black, glowing with darkness.
"Gabby…"
Sakurai Saki ghosted up silently behind her.
And then he witnessed something— she moved even more stiffly than a thousand-year-old zombie.
Gabriel turned her head around as if her movements were being slowed down tenfold.
A few seconds later, she blinked once.
"Oh, good morning."
Sakurai Saki glanced at the gloomy room, silently walked over to the window, and pulled the curtain open.
"Whoosh~!"
With the warm spring sunlight pouring into the room, the angel Gabriel—somehow reacted like a vampire getting scorched by the sun—she quickly raised her hands to shield her eyes.
"It's too bright!! Aki, close the curtain! I'm dying here!"
˗ˏˋ ☼︎ ˎˊ˗( ᗒᗣᗕ )
Sakurai Saki turned back, walked over to her, and firmly grabbed both of her hands, peeling them away from the small face that was completely covered.
"You stayed up all night again, didn't you?"
Gabriel looked as withered as a literal corpse.
"ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴWRYYYY!!!ゴゴゴゴゴゴゴゴ" she screeched like some gay vampire crawling out of the depths of the ocean.
Sakurai Saki, out of patience, reached up and yanked the halo off her head, taking out a handkerchief from his pocket and giving it a good wipe.
"Your halo — you angels — why can a mere mortal even touch this thing?"
Seeing him seriously polishing the ring, Gabriel suddenly blushed:
"That's because I'm controlling it on purpose... We angels only let people we like touch our halo…"
(,,¬﹏¬,,) ♡
"Seriously?"
(ಠ_ಠ)
Sakurai Saki looked at her with pure suspicion.
Hearing that, Gabriel dropped the act and deadpanned:
"That thing's just for decoration."
¯\_( ｰ̀εｰ́ )_/¯
As soon as she finished, a new halo — lighter, translucent, pale yellow — appeared floating above her head.
After finishing cleaning the ring in his hand, Sakurai Saki placed it back onto her head.
"So why did you call me over?"
Gabriel squirmed awkwardly: "I'm starving to death…"
"You're out of money?"
Gabriel replied sheepishly: "I have to wait a while for my part-time paycheck…"
Sakurai Saki let out a long sigh, then reached into his coat pocket, pulled out his wallet, and took out a few ¥10,000 bills.
He sat down in front of Gabriel, then — tap tap tap! — slapped the bills straight into her face!
After venting a bit, Sakurai spoke:
"Pay me back next month."
But after he said that, he felt like something wasn't quite right.
Glancing at the can of Coke and the snack bag on the floor, Saki frowned:
"Where did these come from?"
Hearing that, Gabriel immediately sprang up from the floor and dove into Sakurai Saki's arms.
Though lazy about cleaning, as an angel her body was always kept immaculate—there wasn't even a speck of dirt on her.
"Aki, daisuki~"
(ง ˃ ³ ˂)ว ⁼³₌₃⁼³ (ಠ_ಠ)
Gabriel looked at him with sparkling, love-filled eyes.
Sakurai Saki gave her a glance—then slapped more bills right into her face!
"Stop using the same trick!"
This brat had scammed money out of him more than once with that move before, but just like how Saint Seiya never falls for the same attack twice—neither do espers!
"200,000 yen per month~"
Gabriel mumbled as if negotiating.
She meant... sugar baby allowance.
"That's way too expensive!"
"Just 150,000 yen a month~"
(இ﹏இ`｡)
Gabriel replied, giving him the most pitiful eyes imaginable.
Sakurai Saki shoved her out of his lap with visible annoyance.
"I wouldn't take you even if you were free."
That pile of snacks and cola must've been her last desperate attempt to cling to survival. Saki knew Gabriel too well—she'd rather starve than give up junk food. If it weren't for that "incorruptible" nature unique to angels, she'd probably be a chubby round ball by now.
Apparently, the law of conservation of energy didn't apply to angels. No matter how many calories and how much fat she stuffed into her body, it stayed small—flat-chested like a highway, too.
But seriously—giving up meals just to afford snacks? This angel was beyond salvation.
"Ding dong~"
Just as Gabriel prepared to throw herself into Saki's lap again, the doorbell rang.
Her face lit up instantly:
"My savior's here!"
✧｡( • ̀ω•́ )✧✧*｡
"You invited someone else too?" Saki blinked in surprise.
"Cast the net wide, catch as many fish as possible, pick the fattest one to keep."
Gabriel spoke with a mysterious glint in her eyes.
"You handle my finances, and Vignette takes care of my daily needs."
She counted her fingers while listing her long-term sugar baby survival plan step by step.
The two of them went to the door.
As soon as it opened, a short-haired girl with dark purple hair immediately threw her arms around Gabriel.
Vignette, like a worried mother, gently checked Gabriel all over from head to toe with her hands.
"What's wrong? Gab, are you not feeling well?"
૮₍˶Ó﹏Ò ₎ა
Sakurai Saki replied coldly:
"Her poverty's flared up again."
"And simultaneously flared up: chronic laziness, internet addiction, severe procrastination, academic burnout, and crippling social anxiety…"
Vignette's gentle expression immediately twisted. It was like someone had just hit the "exit mother mode" button.
Vignette: (╬ `益 ')
Through clenched teeth, she growled:
"GA-BRI-EL. You called me over early in the morning... for this?!"
"I'm hungry!!"
Gabriel screamed in response.
"Why'd you bring so many ingredients?" Saki asked, surprised, as he noticed the large grocery bag slung behind Vignette.
The bag was stuffed full of nutritious ingredients meant to replenish a worn-out body.
"Vignette! Let me be your sugar daddy!"
♡(˃͈ ˂͈ )
Sakurai Saki suddenly shouted.
Now this was the kind of angel worth sponsoring! That Gabriel thing? She could go back to hell and be a fallen!
"Kotowaru (Refuse)!"
Vignette snapped back sharply.
"Now I see why you two get along so well!"
A pair of absolute teases, the both of them!
"It's almost noon! Let me cook us something!"
Vignette changed into indoor shoes, picked up the grocery bag, and headed for the kitchen.
But as she stepped into the room, her eyes widened in disbelief.
This place was filthier than the blood-soaked pits of Hell where little demons were raised. Was this really the home of an angel?
"Vignette~ Help me clean up a little, okay?"
( •̯́ ^ •̯̀)❤️
Gabriel pleaded with a whiny tone.
"Do your own damn chores!"
Sakurai Saki cut in.
Every time he visited, he used to help this Useless-Angel clean up, but this time he was officially done.
"Tch!"
Gabriel clicked her tongue and reluctantly moved to the sofa.
Then she bent down—arched her back, and with her small, round rear poking up, she lifted the hem of her long-sleeved shirt, subtly revealing a pair of pure white panties, modest yet slightly teasing.
"G-Gab! Put some clothes on!"
(づ>/////<)づ
Vignette snapped back to reality.
There's still a guy in the room!
Why the hell wasn't she dressed properly!? Now he's seen everything!
"Oh."
Gabriel casually tossed a soda bottle into the trash bag, stood up, and lazily tugged her shirt down a bit.
Vignette dropped all thoughts of cooking. She put the grocery bag down and urgently dragged Gabriel into her bedroom.
Sakurai Saki, however, didn't quite get why Vignette was so worked up.
He was so close with Gabriel that he no longer even thought of her as a girl. Besides, angels had a rather peculiar concept of romance. They valued emotional connection far more than the physical—that's what Gabriel told him.
["In Heaven, we still write letters to express feelings, like during the Heian period in Japan. Male and female angels exchange love letters. So I think, compared to real-life romance, love in games might actually suit angels better!"]
Then she asked Saki if she could use that reasoning to campaign for developing internet access in Heaven.
To this day, Heaven still hadn't built any wireless towers—there was no internet access up there. Computers were treated as taboo, forbidden on the grounds they could corrupt an angel's soul. Even bringing one in was banned.
So Gabriel cared a lot about this issue!
But Saki thought, if Heaven really did get internet, this lazy angel would become completely useless.
Right now, she was only half useless—there was still hope!
He carried the groceries to the kitchen and started rinsing a few ingredients.
A few minutes later, Gabriel was shoved out of the room by Vignette, now wearing her school uniform.
"Next time, I'm buying a full-body pajama! The hamster kind!"
Gabriel grumbled.
Even at home, she had to wear her school uniform... just to keep Sakurai Saki in check?
But what was there to guard against, anyway? Gabriel always thought their relationship was purely platonic. There was absolutely no romantic interest between them.
Could you even fall in love with your best friend? Probably not, right?
Even if he was good-looking, paid for her in-game purchases, and occasionally took care of her...
Gabriel: ∘ ∘ ∘ (°□°) ☝️✧
Wait a sec! That doesn't sound too bad, actually?
If they were seriously dating, she could save on living expenses and totally mooch off him like a parasite—wasn't that the ideal partner?
"Aki, let's get married!"
(づ๑♡ᵕ♡๑)づ-`♡´- Σ(°△°ꪱ)
Gabriel suddenly shouted at Sakurai Saki.
"Slap!"
Vignette lightly smacked Gabriel on the head.
"Girls can't just blurt things like that out!"
"I wouldn't take you even if you came free,"
Sakurai Saki coldly rejected her.
Then he went right back to chopping vegetables.
"Need help?"
Vignette offered, remembering the time she'd tasted Sakurai Saki's cooking before.
The two had first met thanks to Gabriel.
Back then, Gabriel hadn't fallen yet—she was still a top student at the angel academy...
Vignette's eyes grew misty as she remembered that past version of Gabriel.
"Uwaaa~~"
Why had Gabriel ended up as such a lazy, worthless angel!?
Suddenly, Sakurai Saki felt a chill run down his spine.
He was the one who first pulled Gabriel into the gamer's world.
And now... He regretted it deeply.
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