"It's something else they hate me for, the Old Man admitted it!"
Thanks for the big fat nothing with no more amnesty on top, Sarutobi. "You caught me, kid.
" My bland tone completely derailed Naruto's rant. "It's only some people that hate you for being a bastard, literally like I told you last time.
"
"You-that-stop trying to confuse me!" Naruto shrieked. "Tell me the truth!"
"What truth?"
"What do you mean what truth, the truth is the truth, isn't it?"
"It is, but you're not – did the Old Man put you up to this?"
"Forget the Old Man, I'm asking you!"
And that was no small thing with Uzumaki Naruto, was it?
I leaned back and watched Naruto thoughtfully. "Alright kid.
I think I know what to do now. "
The Menace twitched in place, not knowing what to do.
"Wait here. I'll be right back.
"
I went inside and came back a couple of minutes later with my Plan B. Naruto was scowling with his teeth bared at the neighbours craning their necks over their various fences.
But he was still right there where I left him.
The kid almost collapsed in relief when he saw I hadn't just stood him up, then his eyes zeroed in on the coloring book immediately.
"My family has a tradition. " My ancestors had a tradition in a different era in a different time and world.
"It's called the Gifting Cycle. We don't impose on the hospitality of others lightly.
We only do so to enrich each other, and we always bring one of two things: important news, or an important gift. The Gifting Cycle isn't about money, it's about keeping good relations.
A gift can be not just an object, but a favour, protection, sharing something, love. "
Naruto's eyes snapped up from the book to my eyes.
I'm about to disappoint you kid. "For you, though, there are only two gifts that you can give me right now.
Peace and quiet. Time and space.
. " Freedom, but that's not on you.
Naruto backed away, looking hurt. "… If you want me to go away, you can just say so.
"
Is that why you didn't show your face, to deny me the opportunity? "Don't get all dramatic. " That startled Naruto all over again.
"Kid, it's called the Gifting Cycle, not the 'Let's See How I Can Make You Go Away' Cycle. The value of a gift is in the amount of wellbeing it brings, not by what the gift is or by the act of giving.
If I give you a gift, it's because I want good to happen to you too, not just me. "
Naruto fidgeted, not meeting my eyes. "So… is that for me?"
"Maybe. Do you understand what me giving it to you would mean? For you?"
Naruto's face twisted as if thinking actually made him uncomfortable, but it was probably just because he didn't get many nice expressions to imitate during his formative years, with all the- "I'm supposed to give something back. " No duh, kid- "And… and I can't bother you again until I have something for you that's just as good?"
"No, kid," I sighed. "Well, yes, but not how you mean.
It means that I appreciate your intentions but not your actions and want to fix this Cycle of Gifts that you started so horribly badly. "
"Oh!" Naruto said as if he understood, even though he probably didn't. "Why didn't you just say so? I mean-hey, that was still mean!"
"I'm being honest, kid. Because I hope you don't actually want everything you do to keep hurting me.
"
"I didn't-don't! I don't! I really don't, I promise!"
"I believe you, but I don't believe you can help it. Your decisions have all been crap, kid.
"
"Ack! I get it, I get it, mister, geez…"
Of course, Naruto was actually right about the side benefit of the Gifting Cycle, because his thing was to be exceedingly perceptive only when it was most annoying – the other guy did tend to only visit when he had a gift at least as good or meaningful as the last one you gave him.
Let's see how Naruto deals with that.
But first. "Come on, kid.
Show me where you live. If you behave yourself, I'll even answer your question.
"
"I'm super well behaved, you better believe it, but what question-I mean, my question, duh, yeah, that!"
Yeah, that.
Now let's see if I can catch lightning in a bottle a second time.
"Right. So, the only other idea I have about why people are mean to you is pretty crazy, but remember, kid, you asked for this.
"
"I did! I wanna know! What is it?"
"The curse of the Moon Rabbit. "
"EEEH?"
And so, for the entirety of the way to his home, I regaled the positively star-struck Uzumaki Naruto with the condensed fairy tale of the evil horned brownie clan, the Shinju chakra tree, Rabbit 'Goddess' Kaguya the Enslaver, the tale of the two brothers, and the last act of the Rabbit Herself who, in her spite at being imprisoned at the heart of the moon, inflicted a terrible curse on the Six Paths Sage and his brother and children. And their children's children.
And their children's children's children and that's where I stopped because Naruto couldn't wait no more to hear why people thought he had the curse. I made sure to describe all nine of the 'distinctive birth marks' exactly.
I even mentioned 'the Moon Rabbit's shadow' that always emerges to stir up the curse in some dreadful new way.
"And that's why your whisker marks have people convinced you're bad news," I concluded when Naruto finally stopped in front of the familiar building I knew from another life. He was already living alone, how early was he removed from the orphanage? Why? "It sucks, but their concerns are legitimate.
It's unfair, but that's how it is, kid. And for those who were on the fence, a lot of them have made up their minds now that they've seen what you did to me.
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