The smile wouldn't leave my face as we walked down the street. The cold air was no big deal with our furs. A rush of adrenaline from everything going perfectly warmed me up better than anything else.
I looked up at Noah, still smiling. "That went perfectly."
He glanced down, the corners of his lips curving upward. "You mean you nailed it. I was just the silent support in the background, though I must say I looked quite dashing."
"Oh, you were incredible, my knight in disguise," I said with admiration of his perfectly played role, "Ten out of ten for presence. You were silent, scary, and devastatingly handsome."
Noah let out a soft laugh, "Flawless execution. They walked right into it."
I spun around as Noah guided me with his hand. "That's why you never judge a book by its cover. If I had to describe them, I'd say they're stupid, greedy, and far too arrogant to ever amount to anything."
Noah nodded. "Just think how many people walk in and out of that store every day."
"Seriously, imagine someone finally having a little money and just wanting to treat themselves. They're not dressed in the latest fashion, but they're excited, maybe even proud. So they walk into a shop to buy something they've always wanted, only to be met with that kind of arrogant attitude."
It really gets my blood boiling.
"I'm making it my personal mission to walk into these places when I have the time just to see how well they handle customer service. Freaking them out will just be a bonus."
"It's bad business," Noah said simply.
"Exactly, if I hadn't walked in with a disguise, they would have tripped over themselves trying to sell me something. It's a truly disgusting way to run a business."
I let out a breath, my smile dropping. "Still… it makes you wonder how many people they humiliate every day just because of petty reasons."
"A lot," Noah commented, fully aware of the way noble society works.
"Well, they'll have time to reflect on it now, with no one of status daring to set foot in their shop ever again."
Oh, right, Noah also said he'd buy up the whole street and kick them out like some dramatic male lead defending his beloved. Will he really do it? Of course he will!
Noah gave a short, satisfied hum.
Livia from behind commented. "I think you've officially become the villain in a merchant's cautionary tale."
"Good, I hope they remember me every time they reach for a coin in a pouch."
I noticed another shop nearby, offering a fresh opportunity.
"Oh," I pointed excitedly, "a jewelry store."
Noah followed my gaze and then glanced down. "You want to do the same thing?"
I tapped my lips thoughtfully. "Hmm… should we?"
"It was fun," I admitted, "but if I ruin too many stores, it could cause issues."
Noah shrugged. "I'll just raise taxes to balance it out."
"Tempting," I said with a laugh, but I would never want any taxes to rise on the common people. Now the nobles, on the other hand, I'm alright with bankrupting them.
Then my eyes lit up, "I've got it!"
I looked over at Livia, who was watching with a knowing look, like she could feel herself being dragged into something before I even said a word. She had a talent for catching on extremely quickly when it came to me.
"Enter that store," I said, barely able to keep the grin off my face. "Ask to see the most expensive piece of jewelry; just act normally, and let's see where it goes."
Livia blinked, clearly giving in to the inevitable. I'd keep begging if I had to. "Alright," she muttered.
"Alright... after a few minutes, we'll walk in, and I'll give you a hug. I can only imagine their faces when they realize who you truly are."
I couldn't help but giggle behind my hand. "I'm sure by that point they'll already be looking down on you or skeptical you could actually afford purchasing it."
Livia gave me a long, deadpan stare. "You have an evil streak."
"But you're not even trying to talk me out of it, right?" I gave her a few nudges with my elbow. "Do you hate the idea?"
Livia rolled her eyes. "No, I don't." I could see the smile creeping in.
This world is boring, and far too many people still cling to outdated ways. So why not combine the two and turn it into a fun little game? I get to enjoy myself while teaching them how to properly treat their customers.
Livia made her way across the street, her cloak gently waving as she entered the store. She embodied the role with a calm, soft-spoken, and entirely unremarkable demeanor.
No one would ever guess she was the Archduchess of Coldmere's personal maid.
Noah and I waited just around the corner, where the warm scent of cinnamon buns drifted through the air.
I nudged him. "So… what do you think will happen?"
He didn't even need a pause to think about it.
"They'll ignore her at first," he said flatly. "Then when she asks for the most expensive piece, they'll either laugh it off or assume she's confused. Possibly accuse her of wasting their time or trying to steal it."
I nodded along, lips pressed together thoughtfully. "Mhm, you've got some good senses."
"Then we walk in, you'll hug her, and the room will implode," he added, not bothering to hide the grin tugging at his lips.
"I do love a dramatic moment!" Their faces, I'm sure, will be priceless.
After a few minutes, I was ready to make my entrance. But before I stepped forward, I turned to Noah and pulled him gently by the collar.
I pressed a soft kiss to his lips, just enough to make my heart flutter.
He smiled as I pulled away. "What was that for?"
"For motivation," I said matter-of-factly, already straightening my cloak.
Noah raised an eyebrow, amused. "You need a kiss to properly freak out people in the jewelry store?"
I grinned, "Obviously! Now come on."
With that, we entered. The moment the door chimed, I got excited for another round of fun.
The moment I stepped inside. Disdain and irritation ran across the faces of the jewelers, a judgment that said, 'Your presence alone is an offense.'
Perfect! Exactly what I wanted!
Livia noticed our arrival the moment we walked in, and when our eyes met, she gave me one of the brightest smiles I've ever seen on her since she became my personal maid. Is she… enjoying herself?
Hehe… even though Livia and I are very different people, we also have a lot of stuff in common. I guess our personalities are more in line than she's willing to admit.
"Livia," I said with a radiant smile, my voice a touch too enthusiastic, "my beloved, loyal maid! The only one I truly trust in that vast, empty archduke's castle."
Noah looked at me weirdly. I just winked at him, trying to say, 'I'm only playing a role, so don't think too hard about it.' The staff, on the other hand, their expressions already started to shift. I'm sure not because of my presence, but Noah's.
"Did you get a look at the item I liked in the store?" I asked, throwing myself into Livia's arms and hugging her tightly as I nuzzled my cheek against hers for dramatic effect.
Livia, bless her soul, stiffened only slightly before catching on and patting my back with a practiced ease. "I did not," she said, her voice utterly composed. "They wouldn't budge and allow someone like me to view it."
I glanced over her shoulder, savoring the reactions of the jewelers in the room.
But then I froze, unable to believe what I was seeing.
Everyone in the store had fainted. The two attendants behind the counter, a tall man near the velvet display case, and even the girl who had been polishing bracelets were all out cold.
"What the fuck?" I shouted, my voice cracking and rising into its naturally high, cute pitch from sheer disbelief.
I looked around at the full lineup of dramatically unconscious employees.
"This is such a buzz kill. I didn't even get to see their faces crack."
Noah, standing behind me, wrapped an arm around my waist and pulled me close. I still held on to Livia because of my shocked state. I was the literal meat between the Livia and Noah bun, kinky.
"You're getting too powerful," Noah said with a trace of amusement on his face. "You don't even need to speak to ruin someone's reputation anymore."
I groaned. "This was supposed to be my moment, but these pathetic individuals had to go and ruin it!"
He kissed the top of my head. "Your 'moment' has turned into a crime scene."
Livia, who is still in my arms, sighed. "Should I give the clerks smelling salts or just go straight for ice water?"
"I don't even know anymore," I muttered in annoyance.
Noah grinned down at me. "On the bright side, you now hold the record for 'fastest mass fainting upon identity reveal.' Should I have it engraved?"
"…Maybe on a bracelet?" I just shrugged completely over this scene.
As we stood there amongst the unconscious bodies, the strangest victory I've ever claimed, but still one I'd laugh about for years to come.
I decided to stay a little while longer.
It wasn't satisfying if no one reacted. If I was going to commit petty social terrorism, I wanted to watch the world burn, not just assume it did while I walked away.
So I sat.
After about ten minutes, I reached out and pulled the most expensive piece of jewelry from the showcase. It was a lavish choker adorned with amethyst insets, rune-etched silver, and delicate strands of woven pearls.
Without warning, I turned and fastened it around Livia's neck.
She flinched slightly at first but didn't stop me. She stood still, eyes forward, as if being adorned with luxury by her archduchess was nothing more than routine.
"It looks good on you," I said with approval, giving her a thumbs-up. "That purple matches your eyes perfectly."
She looked at me with a resigned face. "That wasn't necessary."
"But it was fun," I countered.
Then my expression turned sly. "So… any men catch your eye lately?"
Livia's face twitched slightly at the question, "Nope."
I gave an exaggerated sigh. "Well, that's no fun."
Suddenly, one of the employees woke up. It was the woman who had been helping Livia earlier. She blinked a few times and sat up in obvious confusion of her current state. The moment her gaze landed on mine, lounging, Noah standing behind me, and Livia casually wearing a crown's worth of jewels, her expression changed.
She collapsed again with a dull thud, possibly hitting her head.
"Seriously, does this girl have narcolepsy?" Both Livia and Noah looked at me like I'd spoken in another language.
"It's a disorder," I explained, "that causes a person to fall asleep randomly or more often… something like that. I'm not a doctor, so how would I know?"
Noah tilted his head. "You speak like a prophet but think like a tavern philosopher."
"What can I say? I'm the total package," I said with a wink.
Another groan echoed across the shop. Two more staff members were beginning to wake up.
Noah leaned in closer, lips near my ear. "Care to place a bet on how many pass out when they realize that necklace is missing?"
I grinned wickedly. "I'm counting on it." It's the most they can do for reacting so pathetically to my little game. Couldn't they at least play along instead of just signing out?