But just as I was busy thinking about the past, I felt a sudden jolt of awareness. Jake had turned around, and our eyes met for a brief moment. Time seemed to freeze as I registered the surprise in his expression. He looked momentarily taken aback, but then he quickly redirected his gaze back to his colleagues, as if trying to shake off the unexpected encounter.
I gulped, my heart racing. I had come here to check on him, to see how he was doing, but it seems like that I have to speak to him.
As Jake and his colleagues finished their meal, they all stood up, exchanging goodbyes and laughter. I watched as Jake lingered for a moment, talking to them before he walked straight towards me.
However, his gaze was fixed on my stomach, and my brows furrowed in confusion at his reaction. It suddenly dawned on me that he must still be thinking about the obstetrics consultation form he had seen me holding the last time we met. I hadn't corrected his assumption then, and now it seemed to have created an awkward misunderstanding.
When he finally sat down across from me, I took a deep breath and broke the silence. "I'm not pregnant," I said softly, avoiding his gaze as I pushed my hair behind my ear.
Jake opened his mouth as if to say something but then held himself back, simply nodding in response. "Are you waiting for someone?" he asked, his tone casual
I chuckled nervously, trying to lighten the mood. "No," I replied, feeling the weight of the moment settle between us.
The atmosphere between us grew thick with awkwardness,—the kind neither of us had experienced before. It was strange, almost fragile, like walking on thin ice.
"Why did you come here?" Jake finally broke the silence, his voice steady but curious.
I hesitated, the words caught in my throat. I had come to check on him, to see how he was doing, but now that I was here, I felt uncertain about how to express my feelings.
"..." I remained silent, grappling with the emotions swirling inside me.
"You came to see me, didn't you?" Jake pressed, his eyes searching mine for an answer.
I stared back at him, feeling exposed under his intense gaze. I knew that nothing could be hidden from him, so I nodded. "I didn't plan to meet you. I just wanted to know how you are doing recently. So how are you?"
He didn't answer my question right away. Instead, his eyes remained locked on mine, as if he were trying to read my thoughts. After a moment, he spoke, his voice steady but laced with an undercurrent of tension. "I didn't notice you at first because your scent is heavily surrounded by another alpha's scent. Your heat cycle must have stabilized by now, thank goodness, you're not using suppressors anymore."
I was stunned. I hadn't realized how perceptive alphas could be about each other's scents, but it was clear that Jake knew I had been with Lukas. The realization hit me like a wave, and I felt a mix of embarrassment and guilt wash over me.
Jake seemed to read my expression perfectly, and a flicker of pain crossed his face. "I know you can't refuse," he admitted softly, "but I can't help but blame myself. I should have marked you as mine already. Maybe then, we wouldn't be…" His voice trailed off, but I understood what he was about to say.
I looked at him, my heart aching at the raw emotion in his voice. I didn't speak for a while, grappling with the weight of his admission and the memories of our past.
"If I'm given another chance, I don't give a damn about everything anymore as long as I can have you again," he added, his voice trembling slightly, filled with desperation.
In that moment, I was reminded of the Jake I had fallen in love with—the one who was always willing to sacrifice and dedicate himself to those he cared about. His gentle personality had drawn me in, and it was one of the reasons I had loved him so deeply. He had always respected me, waiting patiently for the right moment to mark me as his, wanting us both to be ready physically and mentally. But then Lukas had come into the picture, and everything had changed.
Jake seemed to sense the shift in my mood as he let out a heavy sigh, composing himself. "I'm sorry for making you feel embarrassed. Forget everything I said."
I shook my head, feeling a mix of sadness and empathy. "You don't have to say sorry. Last time, in the bookstore... I saw you with a woman. Is she your...?"
He gave me a wry smile, but it didn't reach his eyes. "She works at another hospital. Although she confessed that she has a crush on me, I wanted to date her, but I could not."
My heart sank. It seemed that Jake was the only one suffering, unable to move on while Lukas and I were getting to know each other. I felt like the least qualified person to comfort him, knowing that I was the reason for his pain.
"Is it okay to request one thing from you?" I asked, looking straight into his eyes, trying to convey the sincerity of my words.
He nodded, his expression serious.
"Please forget me and find someone else. I'm wishing that you find your true mate," I said, my voice steady but filled with emotion. I stood up, feeling the weight of my words settle heavily in the air between us. I couldn't bring myself to tell him that I had already started to develop feelings for Lukas. I knew that would only deepen his pain.
Jake's expression shifted, a mixture of surprise and hurt crossing his features. "Stella, I—"
"Just promise me," I interrupted gently, my heart aching for him. "You deserve to be happy, Jake. I want you to find someone who can love you the way you deserve."
He looked down, his shoulders slumping slightly as he processed my request. "I don't want to forget you," he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
"I know," I replied, my heart breaking for him. "But it's what's best for both of us. We need to move on."
As I took a step back, I felt a mixture of relief and sorrow. This was the closure we both needed— a chance to let go of the past, to heal and to find new paths forward. Jake's presence would always hold a special place in my heart as my first love, but Lukas was my true love now, guiding me towards a different future.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~
When I got back home, I found Lukas already there, his presence filling the space with a mix of warmth and tension. The moment I entered the house, he began to look me up and down, his gaze intense and scrutinizing. I could feel the weight of his dominant aura pressing down on me, making me restless.
"Okay, fine! I met with Jake today. Happy now?" I blurted out, unable to hold back my frustration.
He raised an eyebrow at me, his expression unreadable, but he didn't say anything, allowing his aura to settle completely, as if giving me space to breathe.
I didn't want to explain everything to him. It had taken a lot of courage to meet up with my ex and even more to admit to myself that I had fallen in love with this dense alpha. While I could feel that Lukas was sweet and caring toward me, I still wasn't sure what he truly thought of me and our relationship. The beginning of our connection had been so complicated, filled with sympathy, pity, responsibility, and obligation. I couldn't shake the feeling that those were the only things he felt for me.
I understood that Lukas wasn't an unreasonable person; there had to be reasons for his hesitation in confessing his feelings. But I needed words of assurance, a sign that he felt something deeper for me—that he loved me.
As I looked at him again, my mood soured further, fueled by the chaotic thoughts racing through my mind. "You don't need to lecture me. I know what I'm doing, so you don't have to worry," I snapped, my voice sharper than I intended.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~ ~~~
As he watched Stella, he couldn't help but feel a surge of frustration mixed with concern. She was upset, and he could see it in her eyes. But what was she upset about? Was it because I caught her meeting with her ex? It felt like she was still holding onto something from that past relationship, acting as if they were still lovers when, in reality, they had broken up.
He was new to these kinds of emotions, and they were overwhelming. The possessive instincts that came with being an alpha were driving him to the brink of madness. All he wanted was to pull her close, to tie her to his bed and make love to her again and again until she bore his child. The thought sent a rush of heat through him, but he quickly shook his head, reminding himself of the promise he had made to her. He would never break that promise, no matter how strong the urge was.
He recalled a book he had read about alphas and their relationships. It mentioned that alphas who were overly irksome were often hated by their marked mates. He didn't want to be that kind of alpha. He wanted to be the one who supported her, who made her feel safe and loved, not the one who pushed her away with his possessiveness.
"I'm going to my room," he said, trying to suppress the instinctual urges that were clawing at him. He needed space to think, to calm the storm brewing inside him.