This is the truth.
Light Yagami didn't have any particular impression of Hikigaya. His soul wasn't like Yukino Yukinoshita's, with her pure conviction like a high-altitude white snow. At least from his eyes, Light Yagami didn't perceive such resolve.
To be fair, Light Yagami considered himself a normal person, wanting to integrate into the collective like any other normal person. However, he found that no matter how hard he tried, there seemed to be an invisible barrier between him and his ordinary classmates.
Their laughter, their conversations, always sounded jarring to Light Yagami. It was like a predator at the top of the food chain, forever unable to resonate with its prey below.
When Light Yagami first obtained the notebook, he had a very vivid dream.
...
(This is daydream that shows genuine truth about 'this' Light Yagami)
In the dream world, it was also Japan, just like this one, dark and sinful. The death penalty had been completely abolished on a legal level, reduced to a tool for politicians to play their games. Those who were desperate even resorted to violent crime to go to prison, where they could enjoy a life better than what they could achieve working outside.
Game console versions were outdated, couldn't play the latest Steam games? Replace them. Feeling spiritually empty? Apply for a free university degree in prison. Physical fitness declining? The prison provided exclusive fitness coaches.
It wasn't a prison; it was a paradise for criminals.
The legal system was a facade, fairness and justice were lies, and getting what one deserved was impossible. Even if arrested, tried, and sentenced to death, criminals would not receive their due punishment!
The Japanese people in the dream no longer believed in the police, in judges, or in the law... And at this time, Light Yagami emerged.
A decisive, swift, and resolute god descended, one whose net of justice was wide but left no gaps. This god punished all those criminals exuding the stench of evil.
Capitalists from large consortiums who bribed officials, kill! Evil officials who protected each other, kill! Juvenile murderers below the legal age, kill! Those who escaped justice due to insufficient evidence, kill! Villains sentenced to death but living leisurely in prison, kill! Privileged individuals with superpowers who acted recklessly, kill!
This was the judgment of God! This was the God who trampled Japan's ugly judicial system underfoot! This was the God who aligned with the simple values of good and evil held by ordinary people!
And indeed, events unfolded that way.
One execution of justice after another, one act of worship after another, one cheer after another...
Light Yagami became lost.
He grew numb and cold, losing interest and enthusiasm in the people and things around him, becoming someone pushed onto a pedestal by the masses. No one was worthy of being his friend, all who approached him were seen as tools, and even the most essential human connection of family began to become a bargaining chip in his schemes...
He became extreme and unscrupulous. Facing the righteous police who pursued him, he ruthlessly struck them down.
The idea that all actions that obstruct the execution of justice should be considered crimes began to form in his mind.
Finally, he became a god. Completely severed from the world of ordinary people.
A perpetrator discovered his identity and threatened his parents' and sister's lives, boasting that Light Yagami was merely an ordinary person and that if he wasn't killed, he would create a global panic-inducing atrocity.
Light Yagami unhesitatingly chose to execute justice, and in the end, all his relatives perished along with the perpetrator.
[For belief, sacrifices must be made. Aside from himself, the wielder of the notebook, anyone else can be discarded when necessary, even parents are no exception.]
He became a slave to justice.
Light Yagami woke up in a fright.
Because he understood that was him; that might be one of his visible, uncertain futures.
But... what a joke?!
He wasn't that selfless, and he definitely didn't have the resolve to abandon everything. He wanted to purge evil, but never at the cost of losing himself. Even if he lost everything in the dream and became the embodiment of will, Light Yagami never thought of giving up on executing justice.
The will to pursue justice would never change.
Just as he told himself when applying for the club: "I have never considered obtaining this power through the notebook to be unfortunate. I, who obtained this power, am the happiest, and I will use this power to create the most wonderful world!"
Who doesn't want to be a widely loved Marvel superhero? But in a dark world, there will never be such an innocent and beautiful fairy tale. Those who wield power are bound to make sacrifices.
It was after this that Light Yagami made a decision.
[Anchors]
He wanted to create anchors that linked him to the real, ordinary, mundane world.
To have bonds that he could never let go of, anchors that would prevent him from going to extremes, no matter what stimuli, adulation, or ridicule he faced.
Makima is an anchor. She represents indispensable kinship, an invisible bond, a sanctuary in Light Yagami's heart.
Ryougi Shiki is an anchor. She represents... indispensable friendship and that nascent love.
Marin Kitagawa is compassion, a warning bell in his heart, a guiding light that keeps his original intention.
And Yukino Yukinoshita will also become his anchor. She is what he needs: a sense of accomplishment, recognition...
In his dream, he transformed from a human into a god.
In reality, he should also seek the humanity he lost in that dream.
Always remain kind, always adhere to his original intention, always remember the wonderful feeling when fairness and justice prevail, and always remember that he is human.
---
Light Yagami's gaze gradually cleared, his thoughts returning to reality.
Looking at the two somewhat stunned individuals in front of him, he displayed a gentle smile: "That's all. If Hiratsuka-sensei has nothing else, I'll be going now."
Shizuka Hiratsuka and Hachiman Hikigaya exchanged glances, seeing the uneasiness in each other's eyes.
Hikigaya swallowed stiffly: "So... so scary."
For a moment just now, he felt as if he was being stared at by an unknown beast. Under that emotionless, scrutinizing gaze... Hikigaya quickly replayed his entire seventeen years of life, from birth to now, in his mind.
Fortunately, he didn't seem to have done anything too egregious.
His soul was pure! He was a person untainted by sin.
When he came back to his senses, Light Yagami had returned to normal. It was as if that gaze had just been his own illusion.
"Well... hahaha," Shizuka Hiratsuka patted Hachiman Hikigaya's shoulder several times, seemingly to cover her own guilt. "What do you think, about this Yagami guy?"
Hachiman Hikigaya was silent, a thoughtful expression on his face.
What word could he use to describe the feeling Light Yagami gave him?
After a long while, Hachiman Hikigaya sighed deeply: "A lone wolf, he's a lone wolf."
Finally, Hikigaya added, "Like me, but not entirely like me."
---
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