Chapter 17: Trial by Firecracker
Later that night, I kept watch with Tak under a moonlit sky so bright, it almost felt like daylight through a dream filter. Twin waxing moons hung overhead, casting silver shadows over the canopy. The night forest buzzed with a soft, low-level hum—the chirps of strange insects, the rustle of unseen creatures, the occasional haunting screech that made my city-born nerves tighten.
We talked to stay awake. Everything from Sarimanook's quirks to our favorite monster parts to barbecue.
"Hang on," I said, brows scrunched. "You guys don't use tents?"
Tak shook his head. "Nah. They restrict your movement. A fatal problem if you need to react fast. Most of us just use a heavy blanket or cloak."
"But what about, like, freezing to death?"
"In winter, yeah. You can die if you don't have a proper fire." He sighed. "But carrying extra blankets sucks. If even one of us had the Inventory skill, we wouldn't have half these logistical nightmares."
My blood ticked up a notch. "Inventory skill?" I asked, faking ignorance like a guilty pro.
"Yeah. Super rare. One in a hundred thousand, maybe. Having it's like owning a satchel that always knows what you need and where it is. Pure legend."
My personal cheat code from Lola was that rare?
Good call keeping it a secret, paranoid Pepito. Stay mysterious. Stay alive.
Before I could change the subject, Tak suddenly stiffened. He stood in one fluid motion and drew his sword. The chilling rasp of steel being unsheathed cut through the night air like a guillotine whisper.
"What's wrong?" I whispered, my throat tightening.
"Shh," he hissed, scanning the shadows. "Yara! Daks! Up. Now!" His eyes snapped to mine. "Can you wake Mina? She's a nightmare to rouse."
I scrambled to Mina's bedroll, panic bubbling in my voice. "Mina! Stop dreaming about chocolate and wake up! Emergency!"
Tak, Daks, and Yara were already up, forming a tight perimeter around the dimming campfire.
"Yara, what are we dealing with?" Tak murmured.
Yara's nose twitched. Her wolf ears strained forward. "I can't tell. It's approaching from downwind. But it's huge. And it's close."
Then came the rustle. Heavy. Deliberate. Followed by a deep, earth-rumbling growl that made my bones shake.
I turned.
Two glowing, violet eyes blinked out from the shadows.
Tak whispered, horror plain on his face. "Of all the things it could've been… did it really have to be an Umbral Maw Orc?"
It emerged—massive, hulking, oozing menace. Its black fur seemed to swallow the moonlight, and crackling violet energy clung to its claws and mouth like static. It was a walking nightmare the size of a minibus. And it was staring straight at us.
"That's… way too tough for a Silver-ranked party," Tak croaked. "That's a Crystal-rank extermination target."
We didn't move. Neither did it.
"What do we do?" Daks whispered, clutching his mace like a lifeline.
"Nothing we can do," Tak replied, his shoulders slumping. "We can't beat it. We can't outrun it."
A grim, silent look passed between him and Daks. My heart dropped.
They're going to sacrifice me.
I'm the outsider. The squishy support class.
"Hey, man," Tak called. I braced for it.
But instead, he said, "Daks and I are gonna draw its aggro. You go with Yara and Mina. Get them away. That's an order."
Wait. What?
They were going to die… for me?
Tak offered a lopsided grin. "Once we move, you three run. No arguments."
But then—
Another rustle.
Another growl.
"BEHIND US!" Tak shouted.
A second Umbral Maw Orc stepped from the underbrush. Blocking our only escape.
Hemmed in. Doomed.
Mina whimpered. "We're all going to die."
No. Not today.
These shadow pigs hadn't met a boy from Metro Manila.
"Pepito?!" Tak barked. "Don't move!"
Too late.
My hand found what I was looking for.
"Here they are!" I yelled, flipping my lighter and hurling a fistful of Labintador firecrackers into the darkness.
CRACK! CRACKLE! BANG! POP! BANG!
Both orcs roared and recoiled in confusion and pain, shaking their heads like furious, oversized dogs during New Year's Eve in Tondo.
While they flailed, I pulled out my next trick: a spray can.
"Hoy, porky!" I shouted. "How's your sense of smell?!"
PSSHHHT!
A thick red cloud of aerosol burst into the face of the nearest orc. It let out a shriek of pure torment, thrashing and clawing at its own snout. I turned, sprayed the other.
Both beasts were now blind, writhing, and very upset.
The others stared in stunned disbelief.
"Hey, man," Tak breathed. "What in the sacred Moon-Gods' hairy armpits was THAT?"
I held up the can. BEAST-B-GONE: SENSORY SCRAMBLER. "Capsaicin aerosol. Overloads predator senses. Basic urban survival tech."
Tak's eyes glowed with wild glee.
"If they can't see or smell…"
Daks grinned.
Yara cracked her knuckles.
Mina started casting.
Let's just say… the orcs did not survive.
The next two days were completely different.
The tension had shattered like cheap pottery. In its place? Laughter, banter, questions about Metro Manila, theology, and pasig street food.
We found the silvery herbs we'd been looking for—easily spotted now that we weren't running for our lives—and harvested the two twitching heaps of high-grade orc meat. Their tusks, fur, and organs alone were worth a small fortune.
As we prepped to leave, Tak whistled, staring at the loot pile. "There's no way we can carry all this to another town. No Guild, no caravan…"
He looked at me. Hopeful.
"Pepito... your magic pantry. How much can it hold?"
I grinned.
"Plenty."
I pulled out my phone, tapped the screen.
"Scan area. Organic materials. Add to Inventory."
A thousand kilograms of loot vanished into shimmering light, flowing into my phone.
The party stared.
"Awooo?!" Yara yelped. "That's not a pantry—that's a warehouse!"
"The sheer capacity…" Daks muttered.
Tak laughed so hard he nearly dropped his sword.
"Alright! Now we can go look for more herbs!"
We spent two more days happily foraging. No monsters. No stress. Just good company.
On the afternoon of the third day, our little boat glided back into the Sarimanook harbor. The air was thick with salt and fishnets. As Tak and Daks rowed us in, I spotted a small figure waiting on the pier.
"Kuya Pepito!"
It was Marikit—beaming, bouncing, and clearly waiting just for me. She raced down the dock like a puppy.
"Welcome back!" she squealed, grabbing my hand. Warm, firm, familiar.
"Yo," Tak said, smirking. "Is that your daughter?"
"She's my Assistant Manager," I said flatly.
Tak crouched. "Nice to meet you, little miss. Looks like we'll be stopping by your boss's place a lot."
Marikit straightened. "We… look forward to your continued patronage, esteemed sir adventurer!"
Tak wheezed. "She's so hired."
I handed her the shop key. "I'll be back soon."
"I'll be waiting!" she said, already skipping toward the marketplace.
We reached the Whispering Seagulls Guild in no time. Still the same sagging, dusty building.
Tak pushed the door open. "Hey Tina! We're back! Mission complete!"
And there she was.
Tina. On her knees.
"Please, Master Valerius!" she sobbed. "Just give me more time!"
Groveling. Desperate. In front of an old man in elegant robes with a face like carved stone.
My victory glow popped like a balloon.
What. The. Heck?
[End of Chapter 17]