(With surprise interruptions, character roasts, and the author's mental health gently dissolving in the corner)
---
📍 Location: The Recap Center, now turned into a late-night talk show set.
Auren is at the center stage, hair immaculately short, cloak extra dramatic, crown possibly stolen.
"Welcome, beautiful disasters, to Ask the Court: Q&A Edition!
Where you, the readers, get to ask your burning questions—
And I, your emotionally complex jester-prince, must answer them with dignity."
A chicken screams in the background.
"Well, not too much dignity."
---
🟣 Q1: "Auren, why are you like this?"
"Darling, if you were raised by Maelric, lied to by Serina, and stabbed in the heart by Elara's 'goodbye kiss,' you'd either become a tyrant or a tragic himbo. I chose both."
Elara yells from offstage:
"IT WASN'T A GOODBYE KISS, IT WAS A WARNING."
"Still broke me, sugarplum."
---
🟣 Q2: "Is Cladus secretly in love with Elara?"
Cladus enters, deadpan:
"If I say yes, I lose the mystery. If I say no, I lose the fandom."
Auren throws popcorn.
"Translation: He's simping. Like, respectfully. With swords."
Cladus: "...Accurate."
---
🟣 Q3: "Elara, are you falling for Auren or Cladus?"
Elara storms in holding a battle map and a fireball.
"I'm falling for vengeance. If either of them happens to be standing nearby, that's their problem."
Auren fans himself.
"Just say you're into emotionally unavailable men."
Cladus blushes and leaves.
---
🟣 Q4: "Auren, why did you cut your hair?"
Auren twirls dramatically.
"Because I needed a disguise. Because short hair means war. Because someone said it was 'giving villain arc' and I said 'say less.'"
Someone in the crowd shouts:
"It's giving heartbreak prince energy!"
Auren combusts. Sevrin re-enters just to laugh and exits.
---
🟣 Q5: "Does Maelric actually care about Auren?"
Spotlight swings. Maelric is sipping wine. Doesn't blink.
"I care about results."
Auren flips a chair.
"HE FED ME POISON AND CALLED IT CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT."
Serina sipping poison beside him:
"It was good character development."
---
🟣 Q6: "Will there be romance in Volume 3?"
Auren: "Well, I'm legally obligated to flirt with anything that breathes—"
Cladus: "I breathe."
Auren: "Well now it's awkward, thanks."
Elara: "I swear if one more of you flirts during war strategy—"
---
🟣 Q7: "Auren, would you date yourself?"
"I already do. Every morning I look in the mirror and wink. Sometimes I even buy myself flowers."
---
🟣 Q8: "How is the author doing?"
A puppet version of the author is dragged on stage, motionless.
Auren:
"She's been holding her breath waiting for comments. I think she's legally dead."
Soul puppet floats up.
"SEE? THIS IS WHY YOU NEED TO COMMENT."
He jumps to catch it again.
---
🟣 Q9: "What would you all be doing in a modern AU?"
Auren: Drama major. Chaotic podcast host. Everyone's bisexual awakening.
Elara: Corporate CEO by 27. Drinks black coffee and manages war budgets like a queen.
Cladus: Former military captain turned high school PE teacher. Has one cardigan. Still hot.
Sevrin: Fashion designer. Has a cult following on TikTok. Is banned in three countries.
Serina: Politics professor. Manipulates the student council from the shadows.
Maelric: Elite consultant for shady corporations. Gets paid to ruin lives.
---
🟣 Q10: "Final words before Volume 3?"
Auren, leaning in close to the audience:
"Thank you for reading. For crying. For screaming. For shipping the wrong couples. For supporting our insane little empire of lies."
He smiles. Softly this time. No performance.
"The game's just getting started.
But we're glad you're playing it with us."
---
🎭 BONUS CHAOS – POST-CREDIT SCENE
The characters surround the author puppet again.
Sevrin pokes the cheek.
"Still dead."
Auren:
"1 comment = 1 soul fragment."
"She'll rise again. Like me after every emotional breakdown."
All together, to the audience:
"COMMENT. SAVE THE AUTHOR.
TELL US: WHAT DO YOU WANT IN VOLUME 3?!
Romance? War? Haircuts? Betrayals? More Auren meltdowns?"
"WE'RE LISTENING."
"...Even if we're emotionally compromised."
---
Thank you, dear readers, for everything.
Volume 3 waits. And so do we. 🖤