"No wonder they lost. No wonder they had to clean out those ninjas at this time,and no wonder they had to give those things to the Uchiha. This method of killing multiple birds with one stone is simply amazing," Hashirama said, gripping Akira's shoulders with both hands.
"If this is true, then the result is murderous. If you want them to win, they could've done it without any losses. And if you wanted them to lose," his eyes lit up,"well, well…"
"I already imagine how desperate Uchiha must've been when they heard from the mouths of those discarded ninjas that everything was arranged by Akira!"
He stared straight into Akira's face. "Sometimes, I really don't understand what's in that little head of yours."
"Ah? No,I'm not,don't talk nonsense!" Akira tensed under his hands, silently denying it to himself over and over. At the time, he had just confirmed his relationship with Madara,at least, he thought he had,and was in too good of a mood to care when those pests tried to annoy him. He'd gotten rid of them without thinking about the consequences, and now it was snowballing into this absurd conspiracy theory where everything lined up perfectly with Hashirama's assumptions.
"Hahaha…" Hashirama laughed, slapping his shoulder hard enough to sting. "Fortunately you're one of ours. If you were Uchiha… I'd be terrified just thinking about it."
Off to the side, Tobirama frowned faintly. He had opened his mouth to argue,out of habit,but the battle that had just ended ran through his mind again. The Senju had deployed their best, while the Uchiha fielded two tailed beasts and Madara. Even throwing in some forest ambush units,it should've been impossible for them to win.
And they did.
Even after reviewing the situation thoroughly, Tobirama hadn't figured out how it happened until Akira hinted at it. A bitter realization set in as he recognized the gap between what he knew and what Akira clearly understood without saying it outright.
He closed his mouth and stayed silent.
"Oh my god… am I so great? How come I don't know?" Akira kept up the performance. He didn't even deny it anymore because he knew they wouldn't believe him if he did. Just roll with it,let them talk themselves in circles until they tired out.
"Since everyone has their answer," he said finally, brushing off Hashirama's hand, "there'll be plenty of work ahead, so I won't send you off."
"I understand!" Hashirama winked, giving him another lewd grin as he walked toward the door. "I won't disturb your little world of two."
"What?" Akira turned sharply toward Tobirama,and sure enough, the other man was staring at him strangely too.
"Out. I'm not some creepy pervert,I just don't want to cook for either of you. If you want to leave, go now."
"Ack! So heartless!" Hashirama wailed dramatically. "I haven't eaten at ALL today! It's good enough I'm not asking for reimbursement! And now you're corrupting children on top of that? Have some shame!"
"Out!" Akira shoved both brothers toward the exit and slammed it behind them.
"I'll pay! Just show me the fifty,tael one!" Hashirama shouted from the other side.
"GET OUT!"
…
Back inside, Akira sighed and turned around,only to meet the frowning face of Mito.
Another headache incoming.
"Brother Akira, you and Madara,"
Before she could finish, he pushed the bowl of noodles onto the table and cut her off. "Don't worry about those two idiots. Eat this first,I'll grab mine from the kitchen."
"Okay." Her expression softened when she saw what he'd done,saving the first bowl for her even when he was clearly starving himself. If nothing else, that settled her doubts for now.
Until she looked down at the bowl again.
"…Brother Akira? Why are these noodles clumped together?"
"Why shouldn't they be? I hate noodles." He sat down without shame.
"You,you bastard! Give me back my feelings!"
"Denied."
"I,I WILL FIGHT YOU!"
Akira laughed loudly as she lunged at him from across the table.
…
Her questions were dodged again,but they wouldn't stay buried long.
In the days after, Mito kept trying to corner Akira for answers. Unfortunately for her, she hadn't grown enough in any sense to match Akira's skill,or cunning,and each attempt failed miserably.
Eventually, she dragged in reinforcement of her own: Hashirama.
"Hey hey!" x2
Akira stared at them across the table,the two freeloaders visiting again just to eat and harass him,and sighed as he wiped his eyes from studying too long.
"Alright," Akira said flatly. "What now?"
"Actually!" Hashirama scratched his head sheepishly. "You're not that young anymore,and after we build this village,I want to help you find the right girl…"
"That's it?" Akira rubbed his temples slowly. "Shouldn't we finish building the village first?"
"That takes time," Hashirama reasoned quickly. "By the time we find her,it'll be perfect timing!"
"Yes yes!" Mito chimed in eagerly from the side.
Akira reached out and flicked her in the head before she could react,
"OW!"
He showed no remorse when she whimpered in pain.
"I told you not to ask again," he said plainly.
"I forgot," Mito answered with unbroken confidence through clenched teeth and watery eyes.
Hashirama tried his hand at playing peacekeeper again. "Don't be mad at her,Mito just forgets things sometimes. So? Just tell us what kind of girl you like! If you don't,I'll arrange for my second uncle's granddaughter to be your blind date!"
"That girl's from the Akimichi clan…"
"Right!"
Staring at their relentless expressions, Akira gave up pretending and decided to retaliate with his own petty revenge,right where it would hurt most later when Mito remembered it in full detail.
"Haha,so that's how you want to play?" Akira leaned back and grinned slowly. "Fine. If everything goes well and I marry again after this,isn't it better if I take your surname instead?"
Hashirama tilted his head but said nothing.
Akira pushed forward calmly: "Okay then,I don't have many requirements. Just someone my age who meets Mito's preferences."
"Brother Akira," she gasped, stunned speechless for once.
"You'll do just fine," he added quickly before turning away with triumph burning behind his eyes.
Hashirama picked up on none of it,and coughed into his hand to draw their attention again before things escalated too far.
"In that case,I'll keep watch for you," he said with new energy. "You look exhausted anyway,I'll tell you if anything comes up."
"As long as you close the door on your way out." Akira stood up and waved them both toward the exit. "I'm heading to bed."
"Mhm!"
…
After they were gone and heading down the road alone, Hashirama noticed Mito walking beside him while smiling softly to herself.
He waved his hand in front of her face once,
"Ah,what?" She turned quickly and found him looking back with that same teasing grin he always wore when catching her off guard.
"I… uh…"
"You feel better now?"
His pointed question stunned her into silence,but she didn't deny it either.
After taking one deep breath and straightening her shoulders again, Mito answered properly this time: "I'm returning to the Uzumaki clan."
"Huh? Why?" Hashirama frowned in confusion. "Now's when you should stay close,not run off again."
"I want to improve myself," she said simply. "Brother Akira told me once… he likes strong girls,girls who are confident,and ones who are tall… with long legs…"
"Mm!"
Hashirama chuckled with approval and clapped her lightly on the back. "In that case,go for it! And don't worry,not even by accident will Akira find someone new before you come back."
She nodded gratefully toward him before bowing once with sincere respect. "Thanks… Brother Hashirama."
"Good luck."
"Mm." She smiled and turned away without another word.
…
Standing alone in the road afterward,Hashirama's expression slowly shifted as one stray thought crossed his mind,
"Why did I just apply Madara's traits onto Akira's ideal girl…?"
He shook his head hard and clicked his tongue,
"Whatever! Let's play some games before dark."
READ 45+ ADVANCED CHAPTER AT MY P@TREON!
at [email protected] /Zaneninjacat