Chapter 1: Killed by Waifu
Darkness.
A void so deep it felt like I'd fallen into the loading screen of a buggy mobile game.
Then, slowly—light.
I cracked my eyes open. My head throbbed like I'd spent all night grinding for a 3-star pull. My vision swam, blurry at the edges, but one thing was clear: this wasn't my room. No posters of Uma Musume on the walls. No pile of empty energy drink cans. No Earth.
Just… white.
An endless expanse of nothing. No sky, no ground, no sound. Like someone had plopped me into a blank canvas in Paint.
"Where… am I?" I muttered, my voice echoing faintly.
"What happened?"
"Why does my head feel like it's been dropkicked by a horse girl?"
I sat up, clutching my temples. The last thing I remembered was… what? Rolling for Oguri Cap? Binge-watching anime? My brain was a foggy mess.
Then, a voice. Smooth, robotic, and slightly annoyed, like a customer service rep who's been on shift too long.
"Hello, Night Frederik the Second."
I spun toward the sound. There, floating a few feet away, was a humanoid silhouette. Its face was a blur, like someone had slapped a mosaic filter over it for a shady TV interview.
"You are dead."
I blinked. "Uh… come again?"
"You. Are. Dead." The entity's tone was flat, like it was reading off a script it had recited a thousand times.
I scrambled to my feet, waving my arms. "Hold up! Dead? Me? No way! I'm perfectly alive! I pulled a 3-star Oguri Cap last night, and I'm not letting that go to waste!"
The entity sighed—a long, drawn-out sound that somehow conveyed cosmic levels of exasperation. "Humans. Always so dramatic about their mortality." It raised a hand, and with a snap, a glowing holographic panel flickered into existence, like a sci-fi RPG status screen.
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⮞ SUBJECT DATA #99999 – QUICK REFERENCE
• Name: Night Frederik the Second
• Age: 46
• Status: Deceased
• Cause of Death: Hit by a train
• Additional Note: Refer to last memory access for details.
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"Train?!" I sputtered. "What train? I'd remember something like that!"
The entity tilted its head, its blurred face unreadable. "Denial. Typical. Very well, I'll authorize a memory playback. Try not to scream."
Before I could protest, the white void dimmed. My head spun, and memories flooded in, sharp and vivid, like a cutscene I couldn't skip.
———————
One month earlier…
I stood in a sterile military debriefing room, my Delta Force badge glinting under the fluorescent lights. My commander's voice was ice-cold.
"You're discharged, Frederik. Effective immediately."
I didn't flinch. "I'm not executing a kid based on bad intel."
Mission failed. Principles intact. Career over.
The weeks that followed…
Back in my hometown, I traded tactical gear for hoodies and headsets. Mornings were for anime marathons. Afternoons for manga. Nights for light novels and gacha.
Uma Musume was my obsession. Grinding races, rolling for waifus, chasing that dopamine hit. Oguri Cap was my queen. Life was simple. I was… happy.
The day I died…
Rain poured, drumming on my umbrella. I stood at a railroad crossing, phone glowing in my hand. Oguri Cap vs. Tamamo Cross, Career Mode, final lap. My earphones blared the game's soundtrack at max volume. Eyes glued to the screen. One small step forward—
TIITTTTTTTT!
White.
——————
The memory cut off. I gasped, stumbling back in the void. My heart—or whatever passed for it now—pounded. "I… actually died."
"Correct," the entity said, sounding bored. "Cause of death: excessive devotion to a mobile horse girl waifu game."
"Don't say it like that!" I snapped, my face burning. "It's not like I planned to get yeeted by a train!"
I paced in the void, trying to wrap my head around it. Dead. At 46. Because of a gacha game. My life's crowning achievement, reduced to a tragic speedrun fail.
Finally, I stopped and glared at the entity.
"So… what now?"
"Reincarnation," it replied, perking up slightly. "You're eligible for the Multiversal Isekai Program. One wish. Any wish. But don't get greedy." It leaned closer, its blurred face somehow radiating smugness. "You're the 99999th candidate. One more, and I get a milestone bonus. So make it quick."
I squinted. One wish. A chance to start over in a new world. A twisted grin spread across my face. If this was an isekai… I knew exactly what I wanted