Chapter 105: Made Jean Grey Mad
"Wow, reborn!"
Facing the sun, Allen spread his arms wide and basked in the sunlight like nothing had happened.
The three girls were relieved—thank goodness they got him back in one piece.
"Lil' Secret!"
Allen suddenly spun around, one hand on his hip and the other held mid-air as if striking a dramatic pose. Legs crossed, he declared coolly, "Starting tomorrow, I'm sponsoring you!"
"…"
Illyana twitched at the corner of her mouth. She, the dignified Lord of Hell, needs a lunatic to sponsor her?
"From now on, all your breakfasts are on me."
Allen raised and lowered his brows flirtatiously, winking as he added, "Isn't that touching? I've watched Cooking Master Boy from beginning to end. As long as I have hands, I can make any dish—except the kimchi from that cabbage country. That one needs to be stomped with feet."
"Don't eat too much kimchi. Their dramas are exhausting. There's always a couple, one of them has to get cancer. The happy ending is when both get cancer—either one dies, or there's some wild twist where they turn out to be siblings."
"To prevent us lovebirds from ending up as siblings, I'm removing kimchi from my private menu."
While Allen was rambling on with great enthusiasm, the three girls headed straight to class.
"Hey, come back! What do you want for breakfast tomorrow?"
Allen shouted, "Soup dumplings, pan-fried buns, boiled buns, juicy buns, pork buns, mustard greens buns, three-flavor buns…"
The more excited he got, the faster the girls walked.
If Illyana hadn't burned through almost all her magic returning from the Underworld, she probably would've teleported straight to the classroom.
"Crap."
Allen suddenly remembered something important. "I didn't do any market research!"
"But who am I? The top player in City Tycoon rankings! A challenge like this won't stop me."
He scanned the area until he locked onto his target.
Walking over to a trash can, he lifted the lid and stuck his upper body inside, rummaging around.
At that moment, a janitor auntie walked over. Seeing a young man in hospital garb digging through the trash, she immediately felt sorry for him and gently said, "Child, don't go through the garbage. If you're hungry, go to the cafeteria for a free breakfast."
Allen looked up, a paper wrapper on his head, and replied, "Beautiful lady, I'm conducting market research."
"Market research?"
Digging through a trash can for research? That's a new one.
Still, she couldn't help but smile. He was so polite, and he called her "beautiful lady." Even at her age—pushing sixty—it made her a little flustered.
Since classes had already started, Allen could only analyze the leftovers in the trash to judge whether the cafeteria food suited the students' tastes.
Conclusion: there is no such thing as a satisfactory cafeteria.
"Goodbye, beautiful lady."
"Wait a moment, child."
As Allen was about to leave, the janitor stopped him and removed the paper wrapper from his head.
Watching him stride off into the distance, she sighed, "Such a handsome kid... What a pity he's nuts."
---
Meanwhile, in the principal's office—
Logan stood by the window, looking out at the field.
As usual, Charles sat in his armchair and said slowly, "Keep an eye on the new student Allen. He's mentally unstable, but highly capable."
"I am keeping an eye on him," Logan replied casually.
Hard not to, really—Allen was the only one on campus wearing hospital clothes.
"What's he doing?" Charles asked, curious.
"Digging through a trash can."
"…"
Charles thought about it. What could you really expect from someone mentally ill? As long as he didn't blow up the school, it was fine.
"What about S.H.I.E.L.D.'s request? How do you plan to handle it?"
With a cigar in his mouth, Logan brought up the previous matter.
Logan had been born in 1832—not much younger than Professor X—and had maintained a youthful appearance thanks to his slowed aging and regeneration abilities. A rare long-lived mutant.
Because he'd lived so long and fought in wars from the Civil War to WWI and WWII, he couldn't help but attract attention. That's why he kept in touch with S.H.I.E.L.D.—to avoid unnecessary trouble.
Too many people in the world would kill to get a piece of his longevity.
"I've already sent a small team of X-Men to Egypt to investigate," Charles said gravely. "If it's mutant-related, I'll lead a full team myself. If not, they can handle it on their own."
From his tone, it was clear he had issues with S.H.I.E.L.D.
Charles believed in fighting for a world where mutants could live openly and with dignity. In the past, he'd tried working with S.H.I.E.L.D., but the partnership soured, and now he preferred to stay away.
"Got it. I'll pass it along."
Logan actually needed a favor from them too. Otherwise, he wouldn't even bother dealing with S.H.I.E.L.D.—the organization was too entangled with government and corporate interests.
Which made sense. At this point in time, S.H.I.E.L.D. still relied on national and corporate backing to arm itself.
As for Nick Fury, the man who would eventually make S.H.I.E.L.D. truly independent, he probably hadn't even graduated from the academy yet.
Not to mention HYDRA had long been lurking within, eager to stir up internal strife and fish in troubled waters.
---
The next morning.
The 404 Dorm Quartet set up a stall on the school field.
"Think anyone will buy this?"
Wade asked while shoving another potsticker into his mouth with chopsticks.
"Relax. My cooking speaks for itself."
Allen watched him devour the equivalent of twenty potstickers—two full portions—and winced. "Could you maybe stop eating?"
Wade pulled down his mask, adjusted his pink wig, and rubbed his belly in satisfaction.
"One question—why the hell do I have to dress like this?" Wade pointed to the pink wig on his head. He couldn't fathom Allen's logic.
"Dude, you look hot. Customers see you and instantly get hungry. I almost fell in love with you myself," Allen said earnestly.
"Seriously?"
Wade looked over at Pietro and Kurt. The two nodded in unison.
"Sh*t. Let me warn you—falling for me is not an option." Wade flipped his pink wig confidently. "You're way too ugly for me."
"Ouch, that's harsh."
Allen clutched his chest, heartbroken. "I feel like an innocent maiden whose Prince Charming toyed with her emotions and dumped her. I can't love again… love is dead to me now."
"Fine, fine."
Wade threw up his hands. "I'll allow you to love me, just don't touch me."
"Dude… where's your mind at? Amitabha," Allen said, putting on a solemn expression.
Pietro and Kurt couldn't even chime in. These two were just too unhinged—their brains worked on a different frequency.
"Excuse me, what are you selling?"
A red-haired girl walked over—tall, curvy, with delicate features and a soft touch of baby fat. She gave off that charming girl-next-door vibe.
She was, of course, Jean Grey—aka Phoenix.
"Congratulations, beauty! You're our ten-thousandth customer today! You win a free serving of potstickers!"
Allen handed her a boxed serving. Jean hesitated, not quite believing it.
Ten-thousandth customer?
She watched them set up. How the hell was she number ten thousand? What, did he think he was Cyclops, walking around blind with sunglasses?
Still, free food is free food.
Just as she reached for it, Allen dashed off.
He'd spotted Illyana walking across the field.
"Lil' Secret! Look what I made for you!"
Allen presented the potstickers like a gift, eyes twinkling with sincerity.
"I'm good, thanks."
Illyana awkwardly turned him down. Not again.
Ellie looked disgusted—what can a lunatic possibly cook that's edible?
Yukio, on the other hand, smiled and said, "I'll take it for her."
"You can dip it in vinegar, chili, or sweet sauce. Match to taste. Gotta run now."
Allen flipped his hair and added smugly, "A serious man is the most attractive. Don't fall for me now."
Watching him leave, the three girls stood there, stunned.
Yukio took a bite and said, "Not bad at all!"
"Let me try." Ellie picked one up and popped it into her mouth. Her eyes lit up. "I can't believe a nutjob can actually cook!"
They turned to Illyana, silently urging her to try.
Under pressure, she picked one up, tasted it, and muttered stubbornly, "It's okay."
"If you don't want it, I'll eat it!"
Yukio sped up happily.
"I haven't had breakfast. Leave me some!"
"He gave it to me, don't even think about hogging it."
Back at the stall, Allen noticed Jean Grey's disappointed expression.
The free breakfast she was just about to receive had been handed off to someone else. She looked like someone whose gift had been snatched away.
"Sorry, miss. You no longer qualify for the freebie. But you can get the first serving at half-price—just one dollar."
"No thanks."
Jean turned and walked away, her face dark.
"You're doomed. That was Jean Grey," Wade said with glee.
"She's just Phoenix. What's the big deal?"
Allen replied nonchalantly—then froze. "Wait... does she have a dark alter ego?"
All three nodded.
It wasn't exactly a secret. The last time Jean's dark side erupted, it caused a major incident that made the news. If not for Charles stepping in—and S.H.I.E.L.D. smoothing things over—America might've had her on every most-wanted list.
Thankfully, she didn't go full-on Dark Phoenix. If she had, even Charles' powers might not have contained her.
Clenching his fist, Allen smirked, "With my irresistible charm, I can handle a goth girl in existential crisis."
Sure enough, by the end of day one, all the potstickers were sold out.
Naturally, Charles found out. The cafeteria staff had already reported missing inventory.
Given the breakfast stall on the field, the truth was obvious.
"My first time trying Eastern breakfast. Quite good."
Charles munched on potstickers, experimenting with various sauces.
He'd asked a senior student to buy two servings so he could try them himself. After one bite, he kind of regretted admitting Allen as a student—he should've put him straight into the cafeteria.
"Not bad," Logan agreed, chewing his own.
But in his mind, he added, My roast goose is better.
He'd accidentally eaten the rest of the goose and still hadn't dared tell Charles. That gray swan from the lake? Yeah… Professor X treasured those.